Dear Madeleine,

I am a director in the finance department of a national restaurant/foodservice company. I have always liked my job, brought a lot of creative problem-solving to my team, and enjoyed hosting events to create bonds among people in my organization.

My last kid just graduated from high school and left for a six-week trip abroad. My two kids in college have summer jobs away from home. I thought I couldn’t wait to finally have the kids all leave the house so I could have more time to myself and more time to work—but now that it has finally happened, I seem to be adrift. All I have is time, and I don’t know what to do with it.

It feels so strange. I don’t recognize myself. For the last twenty years I have been in constant motion. Even though I’ve loved being a mom, I’ve resented the never-ending grind. But now that I don’t feel the clock ticking, I can barely focus on work.

Ever since Covid, my entire team has worked from home. I am happily single but never felt lonely until now. Maybe I’m just really sad—the empty nest thing—because I have so been looking forward to this time. But it feels like all of a sudden I have ADHD or something.

Have you ever heard of anything like this? Do you think there is something wrong with me?

Weirded Out

________________________________________________________________________

Dear Weirded Out,

There is nothing wrong with you. You are going to be fine. I promise.

Humans vastly underestimate how destabilizing it is to change our daily routines. For twenty-plus years you were on the clock, and all of a sudden you have a surfeit of time. It’s as if you had loud music playing 24/7, you learned how to dance to it all day, every day for twenty years, and someone suddenly turned the music off. The silence is so deafening it can be hard to think. You developed an entire set of skills, disciplines, and practices that made you feel productive, accomplished, and competent. Now, all you need to do is…start all over again.

The working-mom fantasy of having more time to work is common; and, like most fantasies, the reality is often a letdown. Because, let’s face it, you probably already work plenty.

One general principle that might be helpful to understand is this: just because a big change is desirable and makes you happy doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to grieve the chapter that is coming to a close. All the big, happy life transitions (graduating school, getting married, starting jobs, having children, buying homes, moving to a new location), no matter how welcome, require leaving all kinds of beloved things behind. What that means is just because you are thrilled to have made it to end of the working-mom marathon doesn’t negate whatever other emotions you may be having.

Here are a few ideas you might consider to help you through this big transition:

• Take some time off. Go for long walks, take some yoga classes, meditate, get a massage. Anything you can do to clear your head so that you can hear the soft voice inside that is offering clarity about your heart’s desire.
• Maybe avail yourself of your company’s EAP to do a short course of therapy to unpack all of the feelings you are experiencing. Identifying, naming, and feeling them will be a relief and will help you to re-focus on what is in front of you.
• Take a quiet moment to write down all the things you have been putting off for so long. Jettison the things you don’t care about and prioritize the ones that still matter. Choose one thing that is appealing and make a plan to go after it. Learn pickleball, get a puppy, discover ballroom dancing, train for a marathon, find a cooking class. Whatever makes your heart beat a little faster.
• Make a list of the people you care about who’ve dropped to the bottom of your priority list and make it your business to reconnect. Commit to either rebuilding those relationships or building new ones.

I would urge you to take it slow and start small. You don’t want to cram your life so full that you immediately go back to your old rhythms. Just because it might feel comfortable doesn’t mean it is right for you. It took you years to shape your former daily rhythms and it will take some time to experiment and find new ones. You will be able to recognize yourself in a new form soon enough (perhaps just in time for one of your kids to boomerang back home again).

Just kidding. Kind of.

Love, Madeleine

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services as well as a key facilitator of Blanchard’s Leadership Coach Certification course. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

Dear Madeleine,

I work on a great team. We do good work together, and we seem to always find a way to hit our milestones and deadlines. My problem is that our team lead seems to be inappropriately dependent on me.

He is pretty much AWOL most of the time and I am the only person on the team that he has regular contact with. He asked me to create a report to send him every week outlining where the team is with key projects. He sends me to almost all cross-functional meetings in his place, and I report back with updates on the agenda items, what decisions were made, etc.

Whenever anyone on the team has a problem, they hit me up on Slack and I am generally able to help them out. When I do feel the need to escalate, I send an email to the team lead and hope for a response, though I rarely get one. I usually end up using my best judgment and sending him an email telling him what I decided.

It took me a couple of months to notice just how out of contact he is with the rest of the team. I went for drinks with a couple of team members the other night and the topic came up.

It is now obvious to me that everyone on the team sees me as their leader and that nobody really knows what happened to our lead. We all feel like he just kind of fell off the planet. I am just not sure what to make of this.

I don’t really mind. I enjoy being helpful and I am able to get all of my work done, so the extra time isn’t a problem. But I worry that I am letting myself be taken advantage of. I also worry about what is going to happen when it comes to performance reviews, which are coming up soon. I know who on the team puts the time and effort in and who does the bare minimum, but I don’t feel like it is my job to be calling that out.

I am afraid my lead is going to ask me to handle the performance reviews and I need to be prepared. I think if I am going to do my boss’s job, I need to be paid more and be given the title. Ultimately, it seems unfair to me and to the team.

I have thought about bringing this up with him, but our infrequent 1×1’s are always rushed and packed with so many urgent things, there is never enough time.

Any suggestions? Thanks.

Missing Team Lead

___________________________________________________________________________

Dear Missing Team Lead,

I’m sorry—this situation sounds frustrating and upsetting. As someone with a high personal need for clarity, this would drive me insane. You don’t mention when it started or if something changed. Whatever happened to cause your manager to go missing in action, he should have asked you to take a larger role. He should have reached some clear agreements with you about how you would step up and negotiated how the added responsibility might be appropriately acknowledged and rewarded. It is really just that simple. You have definitely been put in an unfair position, and so far you have been a good sport about it. The question is what to do about it.

The choices available to you as always, variations on the classic:

1. Do nothing.
2. Do something.
3. Remove yourself from the situation.

As you think this through, your first step is to decide for yourself just how much ambiguity you can live with for how long, and identify what you really want. If you simply seek clarity, that might be easier to achieve than you expect. Or perhaps you simply want acknowledgement. If what you really want is a promotion, or even a bump in pay, that might be a little trickier. But if you don’t ask, the answer is always no, so getting more comfortable with asking for what you need will serve you well.

You really can do nothing and prepare to stay mum about anyone on the team. At some point your manager will either reappear, resign, or be fired—at which time hopefully you will be promoted to the role you have been doing.

The most obvious “do something” is to have the hard conversation with your AWOL boss. A model you might use to prepare, that has been extremely helpful to many of my clients, is Conversational Capacity. The author, Craig Weber, proposes that we all need to practice a mix of curiosity and candor. You might practice curiosity by asking your manager what is going on with him that is causing him to be so detached from work. You could practice candor by stating your position and how you arrived at it. You can read more about this here. Be clear about what you are experiencing, and express your concerns without blame or judgment. I recommend you practice with a friend to get both the words and the neutral tone right.

Another option would be to speak to your boss’s boss about it—but that depends entirely on your company’s culture. Only you can know if that approach would yield the result you want. If you have a good relationship with your boss’s boss, it could work. Again, avoid blame and judgment.

Removing yourself from the situation would mean trying to find another job, which would probably be overkill. But you could just stop stepping up and see what happens.

Once you decide what you really want and what you are willing to do (and risk) to get it, the choice will reveal itself. You sound level-headed and competent. I suspect you will find your way.

Love, Madeleine

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services as well as a key facilitator of Blanchard’s Leadership Coach Certification course. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

Dear Madeleine,

My daughter told me I have “imposter syndrome.” I’ve done some research and I don’t think I have that at all. I think it’s something else. But I am definitely struggling with something.

I have an unusually high IQ, graduated high school two years early, and attended a top university on a full scholarship. I was offered a spot in a top graduate program that I completed with honors. I have been in senior leadership positions for over twenty years. I’m not bragging, just trying to set context.

About 18 months ago I was tapped to join the executive team of my organization, a global publicly traded company. When I told my best friend, she laughed and said, “Oh, they are nailing their DEI quota by having a black girl on the team!”

I just can’t get it out of my head. It’s true that the team consists of me, a lot of white guys, and one Indian guy who oversees IT. I hate that anyone thinks I have my job because of my sex or my race. I get along well with every other member of the executive team. The CEO and the chairman of the board call me all the time to get my take on the economy and our strategic plan and position. And yet—what if I did get this job as a token? Is that imposter syndrome?

 I have never once doubted myself until now. It is distracting and it worries me. And with the way things are going, now I am also worried that the need to have a diverse executive team is no longer an imperative, and that I will be summarily fired when I least expect it.

Am I nuts? I am hoping you can provide some perspective.

Token CFO

_____________________________________________________________________________

Dear Token CFO,

You aren’t nuts. And you aren’t suffering from imposter syndrome or tokenism. It seems what you might be struggling with is the weight of a bunch of yuck and fear that other people are projecting onto you. And when it’s people who love you and (in theory) want the best for you, it is harder to interpret and to insulate yourself from. This, to me, is simply an example of the dark side of success, which is seldom talked about. It would make sense that the people who love you most would be nothing but supportive, but that is rarely the case. When someone achieves great heights, it can be threatening to loved ones and evoke all kinds of unexpected fears:

• Fear that you might become such a big shot that you don’t have time or space for them
• Fear that you might have huge success only to be bitterly disappointed
• Fear that you will develop an overly inflated view of yourself and your personality will change

And that’s just for starters. None of these fears are conscious—if they were, you wouldn’t have to put up with this nonsense.

Let’s look at this rationally. It sounds like you are comfortable with that.

I asked my pal Betty Dannewitz, our resident expert on imposter syndrome, to weigh in, and she confirms your assessment. She says:

“Imposter syndrome is defined as believing you are inadequate and incompetent despite evidence that indicates you are skilled and quite successful. TCFO doesn’t have imposter syndrome, but what her best friend said is giving her feelings of imposter syndrome. The doubt was planted and that is unfortunate.” 

 Betty goes on to say: “Remember that feelings lie most of the time. So, regardless of how TCFO is feeling, the evidence proves she is competent and capable and they want and need her in that position. She said herself that they call on her for perspective and insight. If she were a token, they would have already checked the box and moved on. In fact, based on the evidence, she is an asset. Believe the data, not the doubt.”

The thing about imposter syndrome is that it can become a catch-all term for any reasonable doubts we may have about ourselves. And who doesn’t have occasional doubts? I have met a few people who truly never doubt themselves and I will admit that they kind of scare me. A little doubt is healthy. It means you are self-aware and you are focused on continual improvement.

Let’s talk about the token thing. As Betty noted, the evidence suggests that your friend’s quip is simply untrue. Betty also opened her response to me with “Nice friend, huh?” which echoed my thought exactly. But let’s remember that the remark came from a dark place that has nothing to do with your reality.

I can understand how you might be worried in this current climate, but there is no reason to look for trouble where none exists. And here is the question I always ask clients if they worry that they were given an opportunity for reasons other than pure merit: What if it were true? What if you got the job because your father is friends with the CEO? What if you got the job because they needed to fill a quota? What if you got the job because someone wants something from you? So what? Because in the end, if you want a job and someone gives it to you, all there is to do is a good job. To prove yourself worthy of your good fortune (if only to yourself). To rise to the occasion, bring your best, and crush it—which you are apparently doing.

Doubts are normal, my friend. Doubt is simply a facet of fear, and fear can be useful. Doubt and fear only become a problem when they stop you from taking smart risks, doing your best work, and fulfilling your potential. You can treat your doubt like a character in the story of your life and talk back to it when it takes up too much space in your head. One of my clients named her doubt Tina—short for Doubtina—and she used to say things like, “Oh, Tina showed up big time this week. We made a detailed list of all her concerns, and it was clarifying. I definitely saw some areas that I could pay more attention to. Then I sent her on her way.”

You can be kind and forgiving to your daughter and your friend, knowing they probably mean well. Just because they are afraid—of losing you or for you—doesn’t mean you have to be. Just keep building those relationships and being your brilliant self.

Love, Madeleine

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services as well as a key facilitator of Blanchard’s Leadership Coach Certification course. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

Dear Madeleine,

I am a Boomer who is three or four years away from retirement (I hope). Over the last few years I have been working with many people who are much younger than my own children. I went from noticing that I was old enough to be the parent of my direct reports to now realizing I could be their grandparent.

I was comfortable navigating people who were the age of my own kids—after all, I was heavily involved in how the world was changing as they came of age. However, now I find myself a bit at sea. I am always worried about saying the wrong thing or doing something that will be interpreted as clueless. (I even worry that words like clueless are passé!)

I wonder what wisdom you might share that will help me relate more effectively to the kids just now entering the workforce.

Okay Boomer

______________________________________________________________________________

Dear Okay Boomer,

You have come to the right place! You are not the only one struggling—there is a fair amount of friction in the workplace for everyone trying to connect with others whose life experiences and perspectives are worlds apart. Blanchard’s philosophy—which is atypical—is that it is the job of the leader to understand and adapt to the needs of their people, not the other way around. So I appreciate that you seek to expand your awareness.

To assist with your quandary, my colleagues and I have decided to shift the focus of this column for a while in order to hear from the exact population you are struggling to understand. For the next several weeks, instead of “Ask Madeleine,” we will “Ask the Intern.” We will field questions like yours and present ideas and solutions from several of our Blanchard interns and their peers in other companies.

Also, I want to take this opportunity to make a plug for a podcast I have been lucky enough to be a part of called Mad & Lucy Mind the Gap, which explores all kinds of tricky workplace topics through the eyes of multiple generational and other diverse lenses.

So stay tuned! I am sure we will provide you with some ideas and maybe even some reassurance that we are all still just humans trying to make our way in the world.

Let’s all keep learning together!

Love, Madeleine

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

Dear Madeleine,

I am a senior manager and have managed people for decades. I am a student of leadership and work every day to be a better leader. Here is something I am having trouble putting into words, but I hope you have some inspiration for me.

I make a big effort to help my people develop their skills so they can achieve their career goals. I put a lot of time in, most of it listening and offering guidance. Many of my team members have gone on to great things, both in my own company and elsewhere. But just as many, if not more, have not. It is frustrating to see so much potential wasted. Everyone has their reasons for not taking advantage of the opportunities in front of them. Sometimes I know what the reasons are, sometimes I don’t.

It didn’t dawn on me until recently, as I watched a brilliant and gifted young person self-sabotage despite my best efforts, that I am tired of being disappointed. It is making me second guess the value of the investments I make in people. I wonder if I should bother.

Appreciate any thoughts you have.

Disappointed

_______________________________________________________

Dear Disappointed,

Well, you did a good enough job of putting your thoughts into words to make my heart ache. I have heard this kind of vague sadness from others, and have felt it myself, but I think you hit the nail on the head. This is one of the reasons managing people is hard. And the more you care, the harder it is.

Disappointment literally makes our brains hurt. The research reveals that disappointment produces a significant chemical response in the brain that makes us feel terrible. The brain stops releasing dopamine and serotonin suddenly and the result feels intense. The higher the expectation—and thus the extent of the disappointment—the more dramatic the yuck. You are not imagining it.

It kind of makes you want to tell people when they first start working with you, “Look kid, I am going to give you all I’ve got, so don’t disappoint me, okay?” But you won’t. And you shouldn’t, because it wouldn’t work. Why? Because it is your own expectations that are setting you up for the letdown.

There is no blame or shame in having expectations, but if they continue to cause you so much pain, you might think about finding ways to temper them. Some ways to temper your expectations:

• Gain clarity. Spell out for yourself what your expectations are. Perhaps have conversations with your people in which you find out what their own expectations of themselves are. There may be gaps in both your and their expectations that will help you to modify your outlook.
• Ponder a distinction. There is a difference between having a big hopeful vision for someone else and expecting something of them. Sharing a big hopeful vision—what you see as possible for someone—can be a huge gift. It can shift how someone sees themselves in a transformational way. But it is simply a gift, given with no expectation or pressure. If someone requires pressure to achieve what is possible for them, that needs to come from within.
• Work on your attachment. It might help you to reframe your call to go the extra mile for your people as a mitzvah. Mitzvah is a Hebrew word that means “good deed” or acts of empathy and kindness. Right now it seems you are expecting something in return for your generosity—which, don’t get me wrong, is totally normal. It just isn’t making you happy. Take something Nelson Mandela said as a guide: “There is no greater gift than that of giving one’s time and energy to others without expecting anything in return.”
• Remember that everyone has choice. Ultimately, no matter how valuable the gift of your time and attention, every person on whom you bestow your gift is going to choose what they do with it. In the end, it is completely out of your hands and out of your control. You are letting yourself get really upset about things that are entirely uncontrollable. You, too, have a choice.

Your conundrum reminds of a wonderful poem, “On Children,” from Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet. I know you are not a parent, but many see the parallels between managing and parenting. I hope this excerpt might resonate for you:

“You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

This may provide the perspective you need to sustain your kindness. Your other option is for you to just give up and decide to not bother anymore. That would be cynical and it sounds like you are no cynic.

So take pleasure in the wins, but remember they are really other people’s wins. You may mourn the losses as well, briefly, but remember that they also belong to others.

Love, Madeleine

PS: I will take this opportunity to encourage anyone who reads this and is reminded of a manager who made a big difference in their life to reach out and say thanks. Just a brief note on LinkedIn would do the trick—or, of course, a handwritten note is always welcome if you have the address. I know—so retro.

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

Dear Madeleine,

I am seeking your guidance. I am studying for a BA in human resource management and will be completing my degree program within the next six months. I must submit a final research paper.

I need to find a topic and put a plan together fast, but I am struggling. Will you assist me in finding the perfect topic that will make me successful?

Unsure

________________________________________________________________

Dear Unsure,

I appreciate the question. I am a little at sea as to how to answer it, though. My areas of expertise are coaching in organizations (helping leaders use coaching skills, scaling coaching, and moving an organization toward a coaching culture) and the neuroscience of leadership. I am not an expert in HR, although I do work with many human resource, organizational development, and learning and development professionals.

That being said, I urge you to choose a topic that is of great interest to you. Ask yourself: What has captured my imagination in my studies?

I suggest you speak to a couple of HR professionals to understand what the frustrations are in their jobs. What problems do they face that you might research? I Googled “top challenges HR managers face” and all kinds of interesting things came up. Here is a link to a report by Deloitte on trends in workforce management that may spark an idea for you.

I can tell you that in my work coaching leaders, the challenges that seem to come up most often these days are:

• Attracting the best talent
• Interviewing to assess the best culture and job fit
• Retaining the best employees
• Helping people get clear and stay clear about their goals and objectives
• Optimizing a team and getting people to work well together to accomplish results
• Helping people manage the sheer volume of change
• Helping people manage the stress of political mayhem, climate challenges, and the pandemic
• Encouraging people to take care of themselves while still getting the job done
• Managing conflict—both for themselves and among their team members

I hope this gets you started. I hope one of these areas will strike a chord with you.

Good luck!

Love, Madeleine

About Madeleine

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response soon. Please be advised that although she will do her best, Madeleine cannot respond to each letter personally. Letters will be edited for clarity and length.

It’s a common workplace belief: You should be able to handle anything that lands on your desk.

The specifics don’t matter. You’re a professional and you can tackle the challenge, no matter how long you’ve been at a job. Admitting you need help in a competitive work environment can be career suicide.

But this belief ignores reality.

Let’s start with new hires. According to Training Industry Quarterly, a new hire will need one to two years to become “fully productive.”[1]

So anyone who’s been at a job for less than 24 months is almost guaranteed to struggle at times.

Longevity at a job also doesn’t make one immune to needing help. The increasing pace of change almost guarantees that knowledge and skills will quickly become obsolete. Here’s what McKinsey & Company said about the steamroller of change: “Compared with the Industrial Revolution, we estimate that […] change is happening ten times faster and at 300 times the scale, or roughly 3,000 times the impact.”[2] 

Then there’s the speed at which knowledge accumulates. The amount of knowledge doubled about every 100 years, until 1945, when it started to double every 25 years. It now doubles every 13 months and will double every 12 hours once the Internet of Things becomes widespread.[3]^,[4]

What about the 10,000-hour rule (the amount of practice needed to reach mastery)?

The 10,000-hour rule has been misrepresented. According to researchers, the rule may be a predictor of success for activities with fixed rules (like chess). But it falls apart when applied to entrepreneurship and artistic endeavors.[5]

These facts are not meant to be discouraging, but they do reveal an important truth:

Being able to learn and grow is essential for success.

SLII®, the world’s most taught leadership development solution, recognizes that organizations and teams succeed as people get what they need to grow, learn, and succeed. It categorizes our capability for a given task into four categories:

• D1—Enthusiastic Beginner. We’re usually at D1 when we’re starting to learn something new. Remember how you couldn’t wait to ride a bike?
• D2—Disillusioned Learner. We inevitably discover that what we’re trying to learn is harder than we first thought. Pedaling, steering, and keeping your balance is trickier than you thought.
• D3—Capable, but Cautious, Contributor. We need to build our confidence in using the new skill. You can now ride around the block, but your first outing to a crowded park is a bit intimidating.
• D4—Self-Reliant Achiever. You’re highly competent at a task and committed to doing an excellent job. Now you can help your younger sibling learn to ride.

When someone asks you to do something at work and you freeze, you may be at D2 at the task.

People at D2 often feel anxious and neglected. They may think their progress is slow and they’re not getting the help they need. It’s such a lousy feeling that it can make people want to give up on the tasks and even quit their jobs.

But there’s help ahead. Here are some tips for not getting stuck in the D2 rut.

• Know when you’re feeling you’re at D2. Doing this can take the edge off and the discomfort out of the situation. A good leader who knows SLII will understand this and give you the support and direction you need.

• Minimize the power of D2 by knowing it is a natural stage of development. It will pass and you will eventually attain mastery.

• Know that your colleagues are going through these stages. It can be helpful to recognize that everyone is having a similar experience. You are not alone.

• Remember your past successes. Think of the many times when you’ve felt you were at D2 and how you overcame those challenges.

• Celebrate being at D2. It means you’re learning and growing. That’s hard work—you’re rewiring your neural network. But your effort will result in a better you.

We sometimes hear our clients say, “We hire only those at D4.” Given the unrelenting pace of change, that strategy seems quaint. Everyone is going to be at D2 at something. It is unavoidable.

The ability to learn and grow is a skill required for success. Becoming comfortable with being uncomfortable—the D2 dip—is the best way to survive and soar.

Editor’s Note: To learn more about helping others grow and succeed in today’s changing work environment, be sure to download the new eBook, Turning New Hires into Top Performers… Quickly. It’s free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

[1] https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/trainingindustry/tiq_2012winter/index.php?startid=40#/p/40

[2] https://www.mckinsey.com/business-functions/strategy-and-corporate-finance/our-insights/the-four-global-forces-breaking-all-the-trends

[3] http://www.ega.edu/images/uploads/College_Readiness_Tour_February_2015.pdf

[4] https://lodestarsolutions.com/keeping-up-with-the-surge-of-information-and-human-knowledge/

[5] https://www.businessinsider.com/new-study-destroys-malcolm-gladwells-10000-rule-2014-7

For years, Victoria Labalme thought she couldn’t succeed without a clear plan. She made choices along the way that were not typical but felt right to her. Even when she felt like she was falling behind, she kept pursuing what interested her. One day, out of nowhere, she received a call that changed the course of her life. Looking back, she realized that the times she had started a project, trip, or dream without having a plan or an expected outcome were the times she had the best results—because she had kept moving forward, not knowing where things would lead. Those times led to her ultimate success.

In her new book, Risk Forward: Embrace the Unknown and Unlock your Hidden Genius, Labalme shares strategies that will help you, too, move through uncertainty and achieve success you wouldn’t have thought possible.

Labalme presents these strategies, developed through 25 years of performance coaching, in a unique, easy to read format. She encourages you to use Risk Forward as a guidebook and focus on whatever thought-provoking activities stimulate you to action. It isn’t a book that needs to be read from front to back. You can open it to any page and be enticed with an exercise to challenge your thinking and help you identify possibilities you otherwise might not have considered.

Labalme shares the most important question you must ask yourself to identify what really matters. She also offers four insights to help you find your way and three questions to ask when you need advice.  With chapter titles like Embrace the Fog, Begin from Within, and Honor Your Instincts, this book will have you looking at opportunities with a brand new mindset.

Risk Forward is filled with real-life stories along with practical tips and tools to help you put your talents to work and chart your own path to success. If you’re ready to do the work, this book is for you. To quote the author: “Some people in life know exactly what they want to achieve. This is a book for the rest of us.”

To hear host Chad Gordon interview Victoria Labalme, listen to the LeaderChat podcast and subscribe today. 

For more information about Victoria Labalme, go to www.riskforward.com/book or www.victorialabalme.com

Dear Madeleine,

I am a senior manager in a large government agency that has been decimated and paralyzed by our current administration. Don’t worry, I am not going to get political.  But I do need help, because growth and opportunity have ground to a standstill in our organization and I have a whole team of mission-driven, smart, passionate folks who really should be promoted.  

We old timers are used to rolling with constant change because our senior leadership can and often does change every four years. But this is the first time things have been this dire. 

What do I do when I have four people who should be promoted to their next position and should be getting a bump in salary, but I have an available position and budget for only one?  I am afraid if I move one person, the rest will be so mad that they will quit and then I really won’t be able to get anything done. I am at a loss as to how to keep people motivated under these circumstances.

Swimming Upstream

Dear Swimming Upstream,

It sounds as if you are fighting the good fight in an impossible situation.  I’ve worked with a lot of folks in government, so I’ve had a front row seat to the four-year merry go round.  It can be hard to get anything done under the best of circumstances, which these clearly are not.

You can’t be the only leader dealing with this situation—in fact, it must be situation normal for everyone in management.  Your first stop is probably to discuss this with your boss, who I hope has some ideas for you.  Perhaps there are some underutilized development opportunities for the whole team that can be creatively deployed.  It is probably worth doing some sleuthing—you never know what possibilities have been forgotten because their champion left with the last administration.  Check the fine print!

The silver lining of this situation is that the cause of the standstill is clear to all.  In regular for-profit organizations, when this kind of thing happens it can be hard to know who to blame—and the mission is often uninspiring. Things like hiring freezes, travel bans, and pay cuts happen all the time in almost all organizations. In smaller, flatter organizations it is almost impossible to use promotion and large salary bumps as a motivator, so management must find other ways to keep people engaged.

Your team must know what is going on. They can’t be expecting you to pull a rabbit out of a hat.  I am always a big fan of telling the truth as you see it so they know what to expect.  If you can promote one person, you will want to be clear about what criteria you are using to make the choice.  The least fraught would be to promote the person with the most longevity, but we know that isn’t always how it works based on availability of openings and skill sets.  It is certainly everyone’s prerogative to quit—but if, as you said, they are mission driven, you might encourage them to hang on for a few more years when there’ll be an opportunity for the situation to turn around. It is easy to lose steam when the powers that be are not on your side, but that could change relatively quickly.  Keep the focus on what you can do under the circumstances and the differences you can make.

Courage, Swimming Upstream. Remember that everyone in your agency is in this together, and you can use the awareness of being the underdog to fire up everyone’s sense of purpose.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

It is so rewarding to coach clients who want to be amazing and who dare to rise!  They are fully aware of their current reality of operating in the normal status quo and are now ready to shake it up.  Other clients gain the desire to rise during a few coaching sessions after self-reflecting and uncovering their goals and who they want to be.

Only YOU know what being amazing looks like for YOU!  It may involve taking baby steps in accomplishing smaller goals. Or it may be making a bigger leap to a larger goal. In both cases, stepping outside of the norm to “Rise to be Amazing” involves the following 4 elements:

1. Self-Reflection – Take the time to think about what you want to achieve and who you want to be in order to be amazing. Define what amazing means to you.

2. Self-Awareness – Recognize your normal mode of operation, behaviors, and thoughts.

3. Courage – Be willing to take a risk, to be uncomfortable, and to challenge yourself.

4. Believe in Yourself – This is huge: envision yourself being amazing! Personally, this helped me achieve completing my first marathon in 2016.  Wow—what a feeling!  After doubting myself and not taking control of my life/work circumstances for years, I chose to Rise to be Amazing!

Being amazing works in your personal life and also in your professional life.  For example, I have worked with many clients whose professional goal was to be an amazing leader.  For these clients, a focus on better goal setting, diagnosing a direct report’s development level, or becoming better at providing direction and support defined being a master at management.  Communication is another common topic where many clients want to become more effective.  This, too, involves self-awareness, self-discipline, and the willingness to adapt one’s communication style and approach.

Who knows what you might achieve if you rise beyond being normal. I challenge you to Rise to be Amazing!!

About the Author

Terry Watkins is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

Dear Madeleine,

I love to grow and develop. I always take advantage of any 360° feedback assessments my company offers. I regularly ask my boss, direct reports, and peers for constructive feedback.

Lucky for me, my 360° scores are high and I generally hear “just keep doing what you are doing” from my coworkers. That said, I still want to stretch and grow but don’t have a clear idea of what I should do. Can you make any suggestions?

Want to Grow

Dear Want to Grow,

What a great problem to have. And I am so glad you asked—because, of course, I have loads of suggestions.

First the obvious: If your organization offers 360° feedback, there is a good chance they also offer training programs. Sign up for everything you can, and become a poster child for your favorite programs. Maybe you’ll find something you are so passionate about that you become a trainer.

Do you have an advanced degree? If not, perhaps your organization will help fund one. If you go that way, though, please don’t send me hate mail. It is worth it, but it is hard.

Ultimately, growth and development will come from creating goals and experiences for yourself that require you to be a little uncomfortable. Feedback is great and allows you to develop yourself in the context of your job and your current circle of colleagues. But that’s still only one perspective.  You’ll want to expand your thinking. Some ideas:

• Look backwards to see where you have had your biggest wins. Think about what made those moments great and what qualities or strengths you have that have gone un-leveraged.
• Move toward the heat. Notice what interests you that you enjoy and do naturally but that may not be on your radar screen. Perhaps you love to write—see if you can contribute to your company blog or newsletter. Perhaps you are an event planning genius and love throwing a great party—join a committee that might need you.
• Build your network. The thing that is most important to your career growth besides work ethic and competence is the ability to grow and nurture a network of relationships. If this suggestion is unattractive to you, it probably means it would be an excellent new area for you to develop. Make a map of people in your organization who interest you and either start a relationship or build on the one you have. Find someone you respect and admire and ask them to mentor you. Scroll through the million connections you have on LinkedIn, find people you want to get to know, and set up a call.
• Build your industry knowledge. Are you an expert in your field? If not, decide to become one. Join industry groups on social media and subscribe to newsletters to read up.
• Travel. Save up your PTO and plan a month-long trip someplace you’ve always wanted to go. I didn’t realize I wanted to do that until a colleague did it and I felt a stab of envy. Guess what? I am going to Mongolia this summer—something I have been fantasizing about for fifteen years.
• Master something. Choose one thing you are good at and you like to do and become a master at it. Mastery comes from intense commitment and repetition, and it can be extraordinarily fulfilling for some.
• Look to the “life” portion of your life/work formula. Maybe your home environment is not quite up to your standard? How about your health and physical fitness? Perhaps your spiritual life could use some attention? How would rate your satisfaction with your relationships in terms of family and friends? Are you a parent? A great parent? You could take a parenting class. Now might be the time to get your home administration and financials systemized and effortless. How about volunteering for a cause you care deeply about? Go walk and play with dogs at your local shelter. Go hold babies in the NICU. Be a big brother or big sister. Spread the wealth of your wonderfulness.

Earlier, I mentioned envy for a reason. We are all mostly uncomfortable with the feeling of envy and even deny it when we do feel it; but it is instructive. Notice what others have that you feel envious of. That is data for you. It’s data about something you secretly want or maybe even need—something you don’t have because you probably haven’t admitted it to yourself.

I hope I have provided you with food for thought. Please let me know what you decide to do—I can’t wait to hear!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan-Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

The same can be said about professional growth and development. If you want to master new information or develop a new skill, simply knowing that something is important won’t result in growth or change. You have to define a developmental plan and then take action.

Whether personal or professional, setting a goal for growth and then taking action on your own is easier said than done. Most people benefit from the support of others when they decide to make a change.

Managers are in a great position to offer this much needed support to their direct reports—many of whom already have either a formal or informal development plan for themselves.

If you are a manager, here are a few suggestions you can make to your direct reports to help them progress toward their goals.

1. “Link your development to your job.” Suggest they thoughtfully consider how their learning and development goals will specifically make them more effective at work.
2. “Practice what you learn.” Have them identify one or two behaviors they want to hone and think of where they can practice those behaviors on the job. For instance, they could practice during one-on-one meetings with you or in weekly team meetings with their peers.
3. “Keep your development top of mind.” To stress the importance of their growth, regularly touch base with direct reports around their progress. Ask them to set a specific date by which they will share a success story with you on how they successfully implemented their learning.

Being someone’s support system doesn’t have to take a lot of time or effort—after all, the person you are helping is doing all the heavy lifting! That said, letting a direct report know you care about their growth and development and cheering them on can make a huge difference in their success.

Are there opportunities where you can help someone grow? If so, try the ideas above and let us know what impact they made!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team.  Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

Hi Madeleine,

I am a hotel manager for a high end property in a large metropolitan city.

I am trying to create a program where department heads and midlevel managers at the hotel can come together to chat candidly about their career goals and how to achieve them. I have a vision to devote 30 to 60 minutes each week to this new program. 

Any suggestions on what sort of things I should focus on in that time duration?

I’d also appreciate your suggestions on what to call these meetings so it sends a good message. Thanks for any feedback. 

Developer

Dear Developer,

Well, isn’t your team lucky to have you! I applaud your desire to develop people; it’s not as common an idea as you might think—despite our best efforts to spread the word.

With the amount of time you are devoting, it will be important to generate consistent value that hits your goals. I have some thoughts about how to do that:

• First, get input. Ask the folks you’re inviting a couple of questions, such as: “What would make you attend?” “What would you want to get out of it?” “What would you want to give?”
• Second, you might want to think about starting with a small cohort of your very best people. Meet someplace nice, make it visible, and spread the word that the group is by invitation only. This way when people are invited to join, they feel singled out for something positive. The group is seen as a reward—an elevation of status.
• Don’t be surprised if people are a little skittish at first about sharing their aspirations. It may make them feel exposed and vulnerable. They need to feel safe before they open up. Starting with something relatively broad like discussing current goals. Ask each person for one goal they would want to share with the group to get accountability and support. By choosing what to reveal, they feel a sense of control.
• Consider discussing higher level management topics like servant leadership, building trust, managing change, leading teams, personal development, or time management, to name a few. Invest in a couple of good leadership books—I’d suggest you start with the greats (Drucker, Bennis, Maxwell, Dupree, Blanchard, Collins, or Goldsmith, for example) and discuss concepts from them.
• For those who don’t consider reading that much fun, excellent lists are available of current top management thinkers. Provide links to short blog posts for ideas that spark discussion.
• Alternatively, each session could be driven by a question such as: What makes a good leader? How should a leader deal with someone who is late all the time? What do you know you should be doing as a manager but don’t quite know how?

In terms of what you might call your group, consider tying the name of the group to one of the stated values of your organization. For example, a value at Zappos is to “Deliver Wow with service.” They might call a group like yours The Wow Club.

Here are some other idea starters: Future Focus Conversations, Career Maps, Plan A Club , Brainstormers, Opportunity League, Look Ahead Club, Onward and Upward, Growth Guild, Career Club, Career Alliance, Rising Stars, or Talent Incubator.

There is always the possibility of a clever acronym—maybe something like LEAD—Leadership Exploration And Development, or MILE—Maximum Impact Leadership Effectiveness.

(You might get more ideas in the comments.)

Do let me know how this works out!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan-Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Coaching a senior leader can be complicated. They have lots of demands on their time, huge decisions to make, and often do not get a lot of direct, honest feedback from people around them.

In fact, coaching anyone can be complicated—because humans are complicated. We are constantly scanning our mental and physical landscapes for what we can and can’t do, what we want and don’t want to do, how we feel, who we like, or who we struggle to work with. Joy, disappointment, fear, boredom, and a host of other bits of noise can get in the way of normal functioning.

In spite of our constant scanning, we are fundamentally designed to grow and change.  Like a butterfly that emerges triumphant from its chrysalis, someone being coached can emerge from the experience ready to spread their wings.

As coaches, our job is to help cut through the noise in people’s lives and support change—sustainable, real, down-to-the-wings change. Sometimes we settle for surface change because that’s all our client is capable of in the moment. But sometimes we get to that deep change—which is always what we’re going for. We are the person who helps in this metamorphosis. Coaching is the catalyst that facilitates growth. The way a coach arrives at that change is threefold.

1. Listen. A coach listens not only to the surface story, but also to what is unsaid. We listen for values, beliefs, cognitive dissonance, and the heart’s yearning. These things form the client’s foundation from which all behavior stems. As a coach, when I listen at my best, deepest ability, I have a quiet mind and am empty of solutions. I provide a calm place for the client to express thought, emotion, and action.
2. Provoke. A coach provokes learning, new ideas, excitement, thoughtfulness, mindfulness, and a belief that change can and will happen. This is done by asking simple, open ended questions with no judgment, no solutions, and no necessity to explain, confirm, or normalize.
3. Partner. We are in the thick of it with our clients. We care. We hold them to be their best selves. We believe completely and wholly that our clients can learn, grow, change, and achieve.  My success as a coach comes when my clients have that moment of clarity, commit to new actions, and really believe, fundamentally, that they can achieve a new outcome.  I am an accountability partner. I am a mirror. I am the person who believes in them even when they don’t or can’t believe in themselves. I am a truth teller—not of my truth but of their truth. I am a conduit. I am a funnel. I am, in essence, what the client needs in that moment to be able to change.

Coaching can create great beauty in the world. You don’t have to be a professional coach—anyone can use coaching behaviors. Be the one to help your people spread their wings and create positive change in their lives!

About the Author

Patricia Overland is a Coaching Solutions Partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team.  Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

I had a chance to experience both of these things when I recently accepted a new position with my company.  Eight months ago, I stepped into a new leadership role supporting a team in Asia Pacific.

It required me to up my game in three critical areas—increased transparency, response to feedback, and commitment to growth.

Here’s what I learned.  See if it might help you.

Increased transparency.  We take our leaders and clients through a process we call Leadership Point of View where leaders take a look back through their leadership journey—the people and events that have shaped them, their values, and what they expect of themselves and others—and create a story about themselves they can share with people and teams they lead.  Because I had the good fortune of going through this process more than seven years ago, I was able to share my Leadership Point of View with my new team. In sharing, I set the stage for each person to have a better understanding of me as their leader that, because of the distance between us, would have taken months if not years to learn through our interactions.  How well does your team know you?  What could you do to increase your transparency?

Response to feedback.  Getting a read on the impact you are having can be a challenge when you are in a position of leadership.  Very few people are comfortable speaking truth—especially negative feedback—up the leadership hierarchy. In my case, I was stepping into a new position with a team located across the ocean on another continent with a different culture.  How could I create an environment where people would feel comfortable speaking up and sharing their thoughts about change?  What was the best approach to being culturally sensitive in China or in Japan?  I relied heavily on my internal teammates to guide me.  I sought feedback following meetings and also asked for patience from my colleagues as I learned about working in Asia Pacific. Are you comfortable enough to be vulnerable and ask your people for feedback?

Commitment to growth.  Growth comes in many forms, including identifying what’s not working, trying on new behaviors, committing to change, and then setting up both the direction and support for doing it all.  Through coaching, I was able to practice new behaviors that had been outside of my comfort zone or different from what my typical style would be.  I also have continued to seek guidance from people on the Asia team to get their input on how I can best serve them and their colleagues throughout the region.

I know my growth in the next year will put me leaps ahead of where I am today. It’s exciting to think about how much more equipped I will be to serve the region and the team. In the meantime, I am on a steep learning curve—but one that is backed with a commitment to serve, which will help me make incremental changes that will eventually feel normal and comfortable. How open are you to growth and change?

For me, a commitment to learning, growing, and evolving to meet the needs of my environment is the formula for success.  See if it can work for you as well!

About the Author

Joni Wickline is Vice President, International Growth with The Ken Blanchard Companies. You can read Wickline’s posts as a part of Coaching Tuesday here at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

Doing this also removed me from the seemingly endless and snarky commentary that accompanies any substantial story these days.  It reminded me that anyone can point out what is wrong, what doesn’t work, and what is unfair.   The insidiousness of the critical perspective is that it attracts additional criticism. Then, a big pile of what’s wrong is mounded up on the table.  It’s hard to see anything else!

But is that useful?

A good coach will tell you to take a different approach.  Instead of judgmental, negative commentary, consider looking around and focusing energy on what is working to make things better.

Focusing on what works doesn’t sacrifice your smarts, or your work ethic:  it shifts your energy towards the positive.  Here are a few other attributes I’ve noticed that make positive leaders more generative than other smart, hardworking leaders.

• They bring curiosity to the table.
• They are as interested in learning from others as they are in sharing their knowledge.
• They understand the value of enthusiasm!
• They are of good will, and see the good in others.

Their successes are not born from an angry, judgmental, know-it-all style.  Yours shouldn’t be, either. Infuse your smarts and hard work with kindness, curiosity, and enthusiasm.  I assure you, it is worth it.

About the Author

Mary Ellen Sailer, Ed.D., is a Coaching Solutions Partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

People need a big container—a mind that is open—to grow. A small container—limited thinking—inhibits the ability to receive and learn new information. In order to succeed, you must develop the right mindset to enlarge your container so that you can fill it with new information, skills, and possibilities.

For example, I recently worked with a coaching client who was trying to figure out if she had what it took to go after a VP position. During our coaching sessions, she expressed a lack of self-confidence along with other assumed constraints. The client doubted herself—and her negative thoughts were limiting her possibilities.

I coached my client to take a second look at her beliefs. Were they accurate? I also asked her to identify supportive beliefs that could lead her toward her goal.

Thinking it through, she realized she did have the experience and the transferable skills to step into a VP role. As far as steps she could take to address specific areas where she needed work, my client identified two executives she would ask to be her mentors.

During our coaching journey, I observed a shift in my client’s mindset. She went from a negative feeling about herself to a positive, confident attitude regarding her capabilities to move into a VP role. She could see a personal vision for herself and the steps required to become a VP. The size of my client’s internal container was expanding as she considered ways to absorb new knowledge, skills, and behaviors. She was on her way to pursuing her goal!

How about you? Do you need a little extra room to grow? Here are three tips for changing your mindset and enlarging your container:

1. Question your assumed constraints. What are you assuming is true about your current capabilities or about the situation? Re-examine your reality, experiences, and capabilities. Reflect on what is causing you to hesitate.
2. Examine your mindset. Which of your beliefs is causing self-imposed limits and an unsupportive attitude? Change your internal talk from negative and cynical to positive and encouraging. Recognize you have a choice!
3. Reshape your outlook with a specific vision. Where are you headed? Identify a clear and precise goal. Create an action plan. Commit to the challenge of accomplishing the goal.

Don’t let a limited internal container stifle your possibilities. Remember, your thoughts drive your behavior. Open your mind and create a bigger container—one with room for new information and skills—and a positive mindset to succeed!

About the Author

Terry Watkins is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

I couldn’t find a great quote on feedback; let me know if you find any. I will leave you with my thoughts on giving praise:
 Being able to give praise purely, simply and honestly to others is the greatest gift you can give. Be the person who steps forward and has the strength to give this gift where it is deserved. You will inspire and bring joy and appreciation to those who are giving their best.

]]> https://leaderchat.org/2016/02/26/praise-where-praise-is-due/feed/ 1 3614 https://leaderchat.org/2016/02/12/want-to-lead-more-effectively-have-fun/ https://leaderchat.org/2016/02/12/want-to-lead-more-effectively-have-fun/#respond Sat, 13 Feb 2016 00:15:57 +0000 http://whyleadnow.com/?p=3595 Do you have fun at work? Do you try to promote a laughter-filled workplace?
These are questions I ask myself on a daily basis. And honestly, who doesn’t to work in a positive, fun, happy work environment? The results are clear: Less stress, more engagement, higher commitment. Plus, when you create a culture of fun, you’re promoting well-being for not just yourself but for everyone around you as well.
Though, it’s true that not everyone wants to stretch outside their comfort zone to accomplish this. I mean, this is the workplace we’re talking about after all. But as a leader, by doing this, you tend to display a more genuine side of yourself, a more authentic persona that direct reports appreciate. When was the last time you pulled an office prank, or sent a funny email? When was the last time you told a funny story, or did something silly to make someone laugh? Of course, every work culture is different, so you may have to find your own version of fun that works. But remember, you are part of the workplace. And as a result, you help shape and create the workplace experience.
Perhaps you can simply start by responding to spam email. You never know what funny story you’ll get out of it:

Dear Madeleine,

How can one learn when his boss isn’t knowledgeable? I belong to a human resources team and have been facing situations where my boss either doesn’t give the right answers or doesn’t give an answer at all.

Since I like to keep trust within the team, I tend to avoid sending e-mails to my boss if there is no major problem. That leaves me with the option of calling him. However, he doesn’t give me straight answers and often changes the topic when I ask him something.

If he does provide an answer and later things go wrong, he denies having provided the answer. This can get critical and embarrassing when dealing with colleagues across departments.

I have only five years of work experience and want to learn more. I have been looking for a mentor who can not only enhance my technical knowledge, but also help me grow as a person. But with this bad boss, I am constantly disappointed as I am very passionate about my field and my boss is the opposite.

Regards,

Eager to Learn

Dear Eager,

You are not alone. As I was reviewing all of my letters from 2015, the number one issue people write to me about is an endless variation of “my boss is an imbecile.” In fact, if you Google my boss is an idiot, you get all kinds of good advice.

The New York Times published the results of a study conducted by their research and analytics department. For the question Do you think you are smarter than your boss?, 5 percent of respondents checked the box in everything, 14 percent checked in most things, and a whopping 56 percent checked in some things.

At this point, I need to mention that I always advise leaders to hire people who are smarter than themselves if they want to have a smart learning organization!

Actually, your situation sounds like three separate problems, all of which have slightly different potential solutions.

Problem #1: Your boss is actually misinformed and gives you incorrect answers that cause real problems for the people you support.

Your solution here is to stop depending on your boss for answers and discover your own resources to get the correct answers to questions you need. The Society for Human Resource Management has an amazing website designed to provide answers and resources. You might consider asking your company to pay for you to get an HR certificate so that you can build your knowledge base.

Another great site is HR Bartender. Sharlyn Lauby is a former HR consultant and devotes her site to helping HR folks like you get it right. Send her your questions. If she doesn’t know the answer she will track down someone who does. Legions of people in the workplace cannot count on their bosses for accurate and useful answers—and the ones who are successful cultivate other sources for development. This problem can be solved.

Problem #2: Your boss lies to cover up his errors.

Again, you are among throngs of people who have bosses who have a weak character and lack integrity. Everyone has a character flaw or two. The very lucky have bosses whose flaws don’t actually get in the way of the job. But your boss’s flaws will only continue to cause problems for you. This problem is not solvable. So—what to do?

You have a couple of choices. You can decide to stay where you are and work around your boss until he gets either promoted or discovered for who he really is. Or you could start looking for someone else to work for, either in your current company or somewhere else. You have five years in the workplace—that’s enough experience to decide what is most important to you. You need to figure out if you want to spend any more valuable time working for someone you don’t respect.

Problem #3: Your boss doesn’t care about the company, the field of human resources, or, apparently, you.

It is a manager’s job to help his employees be successful, and this is clearly not the case here. Your choice remains as outlined above.

We can learn a lot from terrible bosses—probably even more than from good ones. In fact, I find that young workers are often so busy looking for what’s wrong with their boss that they fail to notice what’s right. Take note of all the ways in which your boss is awful and make sure you never behave this way when you have employees.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan-Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

————————

One day, a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name. Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.
That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.
On Monday she gave each student his or her list.
Before long, the entire class was smiling. “Really?” she heard whispered. “I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!” and, “I didn’t know others liked me so much,” were most of the comments.
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. The teacher never found out if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn’t matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another.
That group of students moved on.
Several years later, one of the students was killed in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that student.  She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature. The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin.
As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. “Were you Mark’s math teacher?” he asked. She nodded: “Yes.” Then he said: “Mark talked about you a lot.”
After the funeral, most of Mark’s former classmates went together to lunch. Mark’s mother and father were also there, wanting to speak with his teacher. “We want to show you something,” his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket. “They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.”
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.
The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark’s classmates had said about him.
“Thank you so much for doing that,” Mark’s mother said. “As you can see, Mark treasured it.”
All of Mark’s former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, “I still have my list. It’s in the top drawer of my desk at home.”
Chuck’s wife said, “Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album.”
“I have mine too,” Marilyn said. “It’s in my diary”
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. “I carry this with me at all times,” Vicki said.  Without batting an eyelash, she continued, “I think we all saved our lists.”
Tears rolled down the eyes of the humble teacher.  We encounter so many people in our lives, and it’s a precious joy to see the good in all those journeys.

————————

I shared this story, and my thoughts, with my team in the office – and we had a go at the activity in the story; and what we found in doing so was that people valued the things about us that we often overlook in ourselves. It reminded us all to take the time to appreciate our cooperation, and remember our own worth at the same time.
This story always reminds me that it’s important to value the small things that you like about individuals – we don’t always get along; tensions appear, and friendships can be frayed – but it’s important not to let what’s happening in your life to overshadow, or even color, the way you view other people around you. It reminds me that, even where people don’t get along, you can find something good in someone’s personality; and it also reminds me that sometimes, we’re so busy focusing on doing our jobs, trying to please other people, that we forget to take a step back and see our own value.

The reality is that most of us in our too busy, too full lives, don’t take the time to consciously think about our own growth and development. However, if you’d like to not only be a learner, but also grow and develop, you can do so in small, manageable steps. Here are my suggestions for your development journey.

Find ONE positive, meaningful “stretch” development area. Identify a single positive trait or habit you’d like to develop that would get you some bang for your buck. Notice I said single—that’s because you don’t want to bite off more than you can chew. And, I said a positive trait. That’s because positive change versus problem solving is much more motivating. The good news is that any problem can be turned into a positive. For instance, instead of saying you want to stop telling people what they should do, say I want to better facilitate others finding their own answers. Instead of saying I want to lose 10 pounds declare you want to eat healthier or exercise more.

Define Desired Change. Take time to define what you will do to make this change happen—and be specific. I heard someone once say – you can’t hit a target if you don’t know what the target is. Vividly define for yourself what you will be doing differently?  Using the examples above, maybe you’d see yourself listening to people more and asking more questions versus immediately jumping in with a solution. Or, to support your healthier life style, say you’ll start drinking water with lunch instead of a soda, and you’ll walk for 30 minutes three times a week.

Keep Your Desired Outcome Top of Mind. I am a firm believer that charge starts by simply becoming aware of the desire to change. Finding ways to keep your desired change top-of-mind allows you to notice times when you’ve successfully changed your behavior and times when you’ve fallen back to your old ways. Make a list of your outcomes. Use pen and paper, your phone, tablet, or computer—just record what you want to do and put it somewhere that will be easy for you to read every day as a reminder of your desired goals.

Give Yourself Permission To Be A Learner. Just because you declare you want to grow and develop doesn’t mean it will happen. You have to practice and be willing to step out of your comfort zone to try something new. Think of it as creating a learning lab for your development. Usually you don’t have to go far to find real world opportunities for practice. Just remember when you practice that the old two steps forward, one step back dynamic might come into play. Most importantly, celebrate any and all progress and don’t beat yourself up when you falter. Dust yourself off and try again. If you persist you will prevail.

The human brain is an amazing machine. Declaring a desired growth area and defining what that looks like sets your brain to work toward your goal. When you also keep it top of mind and commit to practice you become unstoppable. Give it a try. If you do, you will be one who “inherits the earth.”

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team.  Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

In short order, the client mentioned five large development goals—and my sense was that he could have easily doubled that list if I had given him an extra minute or two.

This didn’t surprise me—my experience has been that if asked, most leaders can identify a laundry list of development goals for themselves.

What I’ve learned, though, is that for leadership development to be most effective it’s better to focus on only one or two objectives at a time—to gather, versus scatter, our forces when establishing a learning focus.

Biting Off the Right Amount

Developing a new behavior takes time, energy, and practice—and it’s often a trial and error process. If your scope is too big and you try to tackle too many changes at once, it can become overwhelming. When this happens, frustration can set in—which can lead to throwing up your hands in defeat.

Setting a reasonable goal is more likely to lead to success. But reasonable doesn’t mean something already in your comfort zone. The change you seek should stretch and challenge you—maybe even scare you a little.

3 Questions That Can Help

When defining the right level of challenge, ask yourself:

1. With my limited time and energy, what are the one or two most impactful areas I should focus on?
2. What would achieving this goal look like? What would be different? What is the target I’m striving to hit?
3. Who can I enlist (a coach, friend or mentor) to help me along the way?

Focus Leads to Mastery

Gather your forces by picking one or two behaviors you want to acquire or change—and then practice, practice, practice. Try to think of the time you spend in development as a learning lab as you test and refine the new behaviors you want to add to your tool kit. Take time periodically to evaluate what is working and what isn’t. Give yourself permission to fumble along the way.

Keep in mind that learning happens over time, with practice. If you stay focused, before you know it you will master and own that new attitude, habit, or skill.

And after you celebrate, you can pick a new area to focus on!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team.  Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

You cycle through the loop by observing the results of your actions, reviewing and revising your initial decision, and moving to your next action. It needs to be a smooth, continual process, and the faster you can move through each stage the better. In fact, if you were to sit down and map out each step, it would slow down instead of speed up.

The initial concept was based on military combat operations. Consider a fighter pilot trying to shoot down an enemy aircraft. Before the enemy is even in vision, the pilot considers information of the enemy pilot (level of training, cultural traditions, etc). When the enemy aircraft comes into the radar, our pilot gets more information on speed and size of the enemy plane. A decision is made based on the available information. Our pilot can then loop back to observation: is the attacker reacting to the action of our pilot? Then to orient: is the enemy reacting characteristically? Is his plane exhibiting better-than-expected performance? Based on these, he can cycle back through the loop to making a decision on his next course of action, and carry it out.

If you’re looking to work on your leadership, and become a better leader, your first step might be to create an action plan. “In order to be a better leader, I want to do this, this, and this”. Whilst this action plan might focus your efforts, and provide a roadmap; it is just that: a plan.
When it comes to leadership, the way to produce the change of mindset – to improve the skills you require to become a better leader – is to act differently, rather than just think about it.
In fact, acting differently is more likely to make you think differently.
Someone once told me that, if I act like someone that I would like to meet, in time, I’d become a person that other people want to meet (and this is now written on a piece of A4 paper, stuck on the ceiling above my bed, and I read it every morning when I wake up). This is Boyd’s OODA Loop theory applied to being a ‘nicer’ person; but the same can apply to leadership. Act like the leader that you would like to have leading you, and in time, you’ll become the kind of leader that others want leading them.
You can try something new and, after action, observe the results – how it feels to us, how others around us react – and only later reflect on what our experience taught us.
In other words, we “act like a leader” and then “think like a leader”.

Looking past the viral-oriented nature of this video, the main concept presented is critical for leadership. Thoughts, when attached to emotions other than sadness, generally have higher “infection” rates.

Thus, it is important to generate more emotion (hopefully positive and not anger-inducing) around messages that you want your direct reports to remember or share. It seems idea is lost at times in the data-driven world of today, where it’s more important to get across the numbers and metrics than it is to tell a story.
So communicate with feeling and generate positive emotions in your direct reports. Make the topic relevant to them. They will be more receptive to your messages and will remember them better. Let’s infect the world with the good germs to promote healthy thoughts.

Just don’t anger them… or you may end up on the wrong side of a thought germ!

I kept hearing negative words from my client about himself and upper management.  My client was at the point of giving up and blaming upper management for not accepting his ideas.  He was definitely in an unproductive state of mind.   He was facing a brick wall due to his lack of confidence.

During our coaching session, a key question I asked was, “What would it take to break through this brick wall toward greatness?”

This question caused my client to pause for a minute and then finally say, “For upper management to accept my ideas.”  This led to my next questions. “What does upper management need to hear from you?  What approach would be most effective in delivering your ideas?”

These questions helped my client begin to expand his thinking and gain clarity on his natural approach versus the approach he needed to be effective.  As he considered other ways to deliver his ideas, he became surer of himself.  He began to plan to research additional information to support his ideas and identify a person who could give him feedback on his presentation.  He also thought about how he needed to portray himself in front of upper management.  My client realized he needed to be more assertive and take the lead—which was not his natural tendency—while still being authentic.  I could hear his self-confidence increasing as he begun to expand his thinking. He was moving toward greatness!

Through the coaching process, my client shifted his thinking, expanded his perspective, and stepped outside of his comfort level.  He was able to overcome his personal brick wall by identifying a plan of small, manageable steps in preparing for the presentation.  He accepted that he could be successful and was determined to do so.

Any Brick Walls Holding You Back?

Do you have barriers or self-made brick walls? Is it improving your self-confidence?  Developing a plan of action?  Shifting your motivational outlook? If you do, here are three strategies that can help you break through.

1. Increase your self-awareness. It is important to know your natural tendencies in order to intentionally alter them.  This puts you in control of your behaviors.  For example, if you have a tendency to let others take the lead in a group discussion, prepare yourself by having the information you need ahead of time to be more vocal during the next group discussion.  Or consider setting a goal for yourself to state your opinion in the first five minutes of the discussion.

2. Eliminate negative self-talk. Recognize no one is perfect, even you.  Change your negative words into positive words.  For example, instead of staying, “I am too shy to influence others,” say, “I can influence others through my tendency to be thorough and focus on the facts.”  Positive words will move you forward.  Continue to build on your strengths and find ways to develop other areas.

3. Take small manageable steps. You can accomplish anything by breaking the task or goal into small actionable steps.  For example, if you need to be confident in a presentation to upper management, the first step may be to speak to others who have done something similar for advice on the most effective approach.  The next step may be to create an outline based on the advice.  As you complete each step, your self-confidence increases as you continue to move forward.

Create a Different Structure

I believe we all have experiences building our own personal brick walls. And, we all have what it takes to knock them down.  The key is taking the time to self-reflect on your current behaviors and identify one small actionable step toward greatness.  It begins with one small step.  Take that step today!

About the Author

Terry Watkins is a Coaching Solutions Partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team.  Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services. And check out Coaching Tuesday every week at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

• Mindfulness Meditation:  20 Reasons Why It’s Good For Your Mental and Physical Health
• UCSD Center for Mindfulness:  Recommended Reading
• Meditation on the go:  Best Smartphone Apps
• News and research on mindfulness practice:  www.mindful.org

Mind full, or mindful? The choice is yours.
About the Author: Sarah is a Professional Services Intern at The Ken Blanchard Companies. She is pursuing a Ph.D. in Consulting Psychology, and her research is based on mindfulness. Contact: sarah.maxwell@kenblanchard.com.

Researchers from The Ken Blanchard Companies teamed up with Training magazine to poll a cross-section of 456 human resources and talent management professionals. The survey found gaps of 29 and 39 percent between how often direct reports had career conversations with their leaders when compared to how often they wanted to have those conversations.

29% Gap in Job Development Conversations

Survey questions in this section asked respondents if their immediate manager conducted performance planning in a way that resulted in at least one developmental goal that would help a direct report progress in their current job. Questions asked respondents to evaluate the frequency with which their leader discussed job assignments that would help to broaden the direct report’s job experience and knowledge. Questions also asked respondents to evaluate how often their leader discussed the training needed to improve the direct report’s performance during the current performance period and whether the leader made time and resources available to help the employee get the training they needed.

39% Gap in Career Development Conversations

In this section respondents were asked to evaluate the degree to which their leader prepared them for career advancement. Questions asked respondents to evaluate the degree to which their boss understood the steps needed to prepare the direct report for career advancement, explained the organization policies and procedures that impacted career development, and discussed potential career opportunities for the direct report. Questions also specifically asked if the leader clarified the steps a direct report could take and whether the boss felt those steps were fair and reasonable.

Make sure managers are taking the time to have “stay” interviews so they can avoid having “exit” interviews

Leaders play a key role in job and career growth. This survey suggests that significant gaps exist between employee expectations and what they are experiencing at work. Left unaddressed, these gaps create a drain on overall organizational vitality through lowered employee intentions to stay, endorse, and apply discretionary effort as needed.

Retention experts Beverly Kaye and Julie Winkle Giulioni, authors of Help Them Grow or Watch Them Go, believe that job and career growth conversations are one of the most powerful and under-utilized tools at a leaders disposal.  In an article for Executive Excellence, they identify that:

• Conversation has the power to touch employees’ hearts and minds.
• Genuine career development isn’t about forms, choreographing new assignments, or orchestrating promotions. It’s about having quality conversations that facilitate insights and awareness, explore possibilities, and inspire responses that drive employee-owned action.
• When leaders reframe career development in terms of ongoing conversations—rather than procedural checkpoints or scheduled activities—theyhave more flexibility and the chance to develop careers organically.

Mirroring the sentiments of the respondents in the Blanchard survey, Kaye and Giulioni identify that:

• Shorter conversations fit better with the cadence of business today
• Frequent, ongoing dialogue communicates a genuine commitment to the employee and development
• Iterative conversations allow employees to layer awareness, insights, and action more naturally
• The ongoing nature of the conversation keeps development alive in everyone’s mind (vs. tucking it away for a formal meeting.)

Growth opportunities at the job and career level are important drivers of employee work passion and one of the better ways that leaders can show team members that they care and are invested in them. Be sure that your leaders are taking the time to discuss ways that employees can improve their skills in their current role and also how they can continue to advance in their careers.  You can learn more about the Blanchard research by accessing the white paper, Ten Performance Management Process Gaps (and How They Negatively Impact Employee Intentions).  Read more of Beverly Kaye and Julie Winkle Giulioni’s thinking by reading Career Conversation: It’s today’s common sense competency.

• “An idea or theory that is not proven but that leads to further study or discussion”
• “An assumption or concession made for the sake of argument”
• “A tentative assumption made in order to draw out and test the logical or empirical consequences”

Notice that a commonality across these definitions is the element of making an assertion for the purpose of verifying or validating it. A hypothesis is ground for further action; it is an antecedent and not an end result. Miscommunication is often attributable to misinterpretation, but we can avoid this fundamental error by noticing our assumptions and investigating them with a sense of openness and curiosity. The challenge in any interaction—whether your role is a coach, manager, advisor, teacher, peer, or friend—is to become truly curious about the other person’s experience so that testing our assumptions is an act of gaining clarity about that individual’s experience from their perspective rather than from our own.

Contrary to common belief, hypothesis testing is not a function of proving our theory, but rather it is a function of trying to uncover whatever truth exists. Yes, in scientific pursuits, we hope to furnish evidence in support of our hypothesis, but this is not the case in pursuits of human relations. True communication and connection with others requires humility and acceptance of the fact that our assertions and conclusions may be incorrect. If we are always hypothesizing then we must also be ever curious and open to alternatives, asking, “What else might explain this? What might I not be aware of?”
Thich Nhat Hanh (pronounced Tick-Naught-Han), is a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, author, teacher, Zen Master, and Nobel Peace Prize nominee for his activism and advocacy of nonviolent solutions to conflict. You do not need to endorse Buddhist philosophy in order to appreciate Thich Nhat Hanh’s approachable writing style and germane messaging. In one of his seminal books, Being Peace, Thich Nhat Hanh uses the quote above to explain what is needed in order to achieve true understanding in communication. If we only seek to validate our own preconceived notions without acknowledging that our way of thinking might be flawed, then we will not be able to truly understand whatever we are facing.

Each interaction, each conversation, each moment of life is associated with some image in our minds. We create a story about that image, and Ansel Adams reminds us that we are not the only ones looking at our pictures. Others are involved in those interactions, conversations, and moments.  Two photographers can stand aside one another taking in the same landscape, but the images they see and capture through their lenses will be different depending on what and where they choose to focus. Two viewers may look upon the same photograph and see or describe it in very different ways depending upon their interpretation and the meaning they assign to what they see. It’s all about how you make sense of what you observe.

In the art of communication, the skilled performer is ever conscious that the image seen may not reflect the one captured, and the story created by the viewer may not match the one being projected by the sender. If you truly seek to understand another person’s point of view, you must be willing to see the world through their lens. Like photography and all fine arts, perspective-taking is a skill which is developed over time through diligent practice, keen observation, acute trial and error, and endless wonder about the natural world. You are always creating images and painting pictures from your own pallet of interpretation. How might someone else see it differently? What would it be like to view the world through another lens? What is the potential benefit and beauty of considering another point of view? What else might be present? What else could sharpen your image? What are you not seeing? In what other ways could this situation being conceptualized or understood?
Remember that you are always hypothesizing, so ask yourself, “what am I not yet aware of?”

About the Author: Sarah is a Professional Services Intern at The Ken Blanchard Companies. She is pursuing a Ph.D. in Consulting Psychology, and her research is based on mindfulness. Contact: sarah.maxwell@kenblanchard.com.
Image Credit: 1, 2, 3, 4

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

1. “The squeaky wheel gets the grease.”
2. “No news is good news.”

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

• 35% of respondents consider lack of recognition the primary hindrance to their productivity
• 16% of respondents left their previous job based on a lack of recognition
• 17% of respondents stated that they have never been recognized at their place of employment
• 69% of respondents stated they would work harder if they received increased recognition

In other words, if only the squeaky wheel is getting the grease, you might look down one day and find that some of your wheels have simply disappeared while your ride is sitting up on blocks.
It takes effort, but intentionally finding people doing things right can have a positive outcome on your work environment, such as lower turnover and higher productivity.  If you can train yourself to also be on the lookout for the positives, you can turn it into a habit.
Leave your comments!

Video Credit: BBDS Talent

Jennifer believed she could do anything as long as she put her mind to it. And the same is true for anyone else.

Are you facing a challenge that seems too difficult to overcome? Try thinking outside the box, or ask for a second opinion. But be persistent and remember that sometimes a few falls are necessary before you can fly.

So remove “can’t” from your vocabulary and motivate yourself to stick to it. You may surprise yourself with how much you can achieve!

What a mystical experience it was to be floating freely through the abyss, not struggling and fearful, but literally and figuratively buoyant. I fell in love with diving that day! More importantly, I gained an enormous sense of confidence in my ability to overcome the greatest obstacle to pursuing my dreams: fear.

“Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius and power and magic in it.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
How many times have you allowed fear to speak louder than reason or passion and missed an opportunity to challenge yourself and take a chance on growth in your personal or professional life? No one is immune from fear and it serves its purpose in warning us of potential threat, but it need not hold you back. You can still explore, try new things, step into the unknown, and know that you are in control even if you’re anxious. You can likely recount your own vivid tale of standing at the edge of whatever it is you were afraid to do, then taking that giant leap forward and feeling the rush of pure joy and pride afterwards. Revel in those moments and soak in the strength of resilience that you build when you do choose to face your fears. The first step is choosing to do it. The next step is going out and doing it. Share your stories below.
Boldness be your friend!
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” -Dale Carnegie
About the Author:
Sarah is a Professional Services Intern at The Ken Blanchard Companies. She is also pursuing a Ph.D. in Consulting Psychology and her research is based on mindfulness. You can reach her at sarah.maxwell@kenblanchard.com.

Click the image below for a simple demonstration of flow (use the mouse to move and remember to return when you’re finished):

The creator of this simple game used Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of flow to develop the game elements. Since you can decide when to move further, you are always in control of both the level of challenge and skill, meaning you can always keep yourself in a state of flow.

Now think about your direct reports and their tasks. Are they in a state of flow? If not, is it due to the task being too difficult, or the direct reports not having high enough skills? Or perhaps the challenge isn’t increasing proportionately with their skills? And think about your own tasks. Are you in a state of flow? Why or why not? What can you do to improve your workplace and encourage more flow?

It’s clear that employees can become more engaged and productive, while constantly developing and growing, by applying this simple model to the workplace. So the next time you’re at work, try adjusting the level of challenge to match the level of skill. You might be surprised to find how much fun you can have while in flow!

Image Credit: 1

Whether it’s July 2nd or July 4th, I know one thing’s for sure. There have been incredible men and women who have sacrificed and fought to keep our nation independent. So let’s celebrate and cheer, not just for our nation, but for the folks who make up our great nation.
Gus is a Learning and Performance Professional at the Ken Blanchard Companies and is currently finishing his PhD in I/O Psychology. He can be reached at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

 “The need to live is our physical need for such things as food, clothing, shelter, economical well-being, health. The need to love is our social need to relate to other people, to belong, to love and to be loved. The need to learn is our mental need to develop and to grow. And the need to leave a legacy is our spiritual need to have a sense of meaning, purpose, personal congruence, and contribution.”
—Stephen R. Covey

The “L” word—the BIG one—is legacy, the story of you and your imprint upon the world. It’s been a repeated topic of conversation in my spheres lately, as it should be in yours. Visioning is central to the success of organizations, teams, leaders, and individual contributors because it creates a dialogue around the meaning and value behind the work that we do. Your legacy extends far beyond your career into your personal and professional relationships; your family or community involvement and recreational activities; and in your moment-to-moment everyday experiences. What kind of legacy are you building, and where do you even begin? Covey reminds us that life is short, so ask yourself:

• What makes life worth living? What’s missing?
• What do I need to learn? To unlearn?
• How will I be remembered?
• What do I dream of?

These are big questions—Give yourself time to develop honest and deeply rooted answers.  It can be tempting to dismiss dreams as unattainable or impractical, but dreams stem from a place within each of us that British philosopher, Alan Watts, calls “the deep, down, basic, whatever there is.” In this inspirational video, Watts talks about the human need to feel significant and connected to something greater than ourselves:

There is nothing trivial about finding and giving voice to your purpose in life and however you frame the concept of legacy, the story is yours to write. In another moving video, The Real You, Watts talks about the idea of waking up and finding out who you are. An individual’s sense of self is a complex, idiosyncratic, and exquisite answer to the venerable question: Who AM I?
Before you can build a meaningful legacy, you first need to have a clear picture of who you are and what gives value and purpose to your life. Because your identity defines how you see yourself belonging in the world and relating to others, it is fundamental to creating your vision, living your dreams, and leading others to do the same. In Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, the peak is self-actualization—the human need for self-fulfillment and striving to achieve one’s highest potential. This is a process of continual learning so you can always seek new ways of infusing energy and creativity into your everyday events.

Self-development is profound work but it doesn’t need to be intense. A variation of Covey’s four basic needs overlays learning with laughter because we can’t be serious all the time. That’s also why one of the founding principles of The Ken Blanchard Companies is to have fun! On your journey of life, never forget the gift of child-like wonder—not in the sense of immaturity or naivety, but rather of being curious and light-hearted along the way. As you think about who you are and most importantly the unique story you are leading, remember that life is short. Keep the “L” word always in mind.

About the Author:
Sarah is a Professional Services Intern at The Ken Blanchard Companies. She is also pursuing a Ph.D. in Consulting Psychology and her research is based on mindfulness. You can reach her at sarah.maxwell@kenblanchard.com.

With this knowledge of the power of thought, you can become a better leader and, as well, motivate your employees to become better workers. Imagine successfully navigating through a difficult conversation. Imagine making your employees feel cared for. Imagine implementing positive change. The more you imagine, the more successful you can be when it comes time to act.

The same holds true for your employees. Let them know that visualizing success can have a huge impact on actual success. Share this video with them. Encourage them to use imagination as a tool for practicing on a new task when hands-on time is limited.

About the author: Hart is an HR Data Analyst at The Ken Blanchard Companies, finishing his Ph.D. in I/O Psychology. He can be reached at hart.lee@kenblanchard.com.

The goal was “get the delicious cake” and you had to draw your solution. No other rules were given.

One response showed the figure crawling through the spikes, while others used elements from pop culture to get the cake. For instance, Harry Potter magic spells, Star Wars lightsabers, and Super Mario warp pipes were all presented as solutions to this challenge. The following are a few of the more original and creative ways people attained the cake:

Use the door!

When you want to get rid of something in an image, the eraser tool is handy

Thinking outside of the box

The lesson I took from this was that people can get very creative when presented with a problem and given the freedom to devise a solution.

As a leader, you may have goals you need to accomplish, but it is left up to you to determine how to accomplish those goals. With a little time and ingenuity, you can come up with many different and often surprising ways to achieve those goals, particularly when you have the help of others.

So how would you get to the delicious cake? Type your solution in the comments, or you can use your favorite image editor or an online one and post a visual of your solution.

From what I’ve experienced, being around a group enhances the effects of the smile test. Why? Because happiness is contagious. And by smiling, you encourage better moods in the people around you, which can even circle back around and improve your own mood further.

So share your smile and laughter with those around you as much as you can every day. You’ll be regarded as a more positive leader, someone who uplifts and inspires anyone and everyone. You may even find, as Brent did in his experiment, that your day becomes a lot brighter!

Smiling Girl

How quickly things change in 10 years

Technology changes so rapidly that it is incredibly difficult to keep up with the rate of change. But looking at leadership, have there been as many revolutionary changes in the last seven years as there have been in technology?

Mobile World Congress was this week in Barcelona. For those who don’t know, it’s a huge annual conference where some of the top smartphone manufacturers introduce their latest products. Though Apple was absent, Samsung announced their latest flagship phone, the Galaxy S5. Some advances from the previous version include improved battery life, updated camera, faster processor, a heart-rate monitor, and a new fingerprint scanner (a la iPhone 5s), but despite all of these, its reception has been generally lukewarm because the changes weren’t quite revolutionary.

The response to the S5

Consumers of technology these days demand constant innovation from products. Why shouldn’t your direct reports, the consumers of your leadership, demand the same? Would you be able to keep up?

Let’s get the ball rolling on change. Are you currently doing something differently from other leaders to improve your leadership skills and/or meet the needs of your direct reports? Perhaps that thing you do is actually the game-changer that will revolutionize leadership as we know it. Share it in the comments.

Image Credit: 1 | 2 | 3

–Dorothy Corkville Briggs

Becoming the person we want to be is a gradual process. We learn and grow line upon line. Here is a three-step process that can help you on your journey to become the person you desire to be.

Step 1: Have a clear vision of who you want to become

The process starts by having a clear picture of who we want to be. Each of us has been given a script to play based on a combination of our genetics (what we inherited) the way we were raised, and our current environment. We can either live out those scripts, or we can choose to write and act out our own new script. (See last month’s post for a process on writing out a new script for your life.) Whose script are you acting out?

Step 2: Start each week with reflection and planning

Before the week begins, sit down and review each role in your life. For each and every role, reread your aspirational statement. (See last month’s post for more on this.)  Now ask yourself the following questions:

• Are you closer to becoming the person you want to become in that role?
• What went well last week?
• What would you like to do better this week?
• What is the most important thing you can do this week to become the person you desire to be?

The answer to the last question can be a specific action such as taking a loved one to dinner, or it might be an area to focus on such as, “listen better.”

Step 3: Forgive ourselves when we are not perfect

I love the wisdom of Mr. Rogers. He once said:

“Some days, dong the ‘best we can’ may still fall short of what we would like to be able to do, but life isn’t perfect – on any front – and doing what we can with what we have is the most we should expect of ourselves or anyone else.”

~Fred Rogers

Remember that this is a journey. There will be moments when you fall short of your goal. When you do, remember to forgive yourself and recognize the progress you have made over time. Are you closer today than you were last year to being the father or mother, husband or wife, manager or employee, you want to become? If you can answer, “YES” to that question, you are on the right path.

As always, I would love to hear your thoughts and/or questions.

About the author

John Hester is a senior consulting partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies who specializes in performance, productivity, and self-leadership.

Employee Oversupervision by Manager

Communicating to Determine the Optimal Amount of Supervision

1. Talk with your direct report. He/she knows best how much supervision you should provide. Ask about any areas of a task where he or she would like more supervision and if there are any areas where he/she would be comfortable with less supervision.
2. Show that you care. Remember that your goal is to learn how to better tailor your supervision to your direct report needs. And by meeting these needs, he/she will be more satisfied, committed, and better prepared to work well. Describe to your direct report how much you want these things for him/her.
3. Follow through. Don’t you hate when you trust someone to do certain actions (especially for something that impacts you), and he/she lets you down? Your direct report is trusting you to follow through with what you agreed. Be sure to prioritize this, as trust is easy to lose and difficult to gain.

Image Credit: 1 | 2

Change is difficult

So why will this year be different? Because I will share a secret that will help you to actually achieve your resolutions: Make your resolutions easy.
Now this does not mean that you reduce your weight loss goal to -5lbs or that you discard your quest to read 50 books this year and instead read 2 lines of a blog post. What I mean is, do all of the prework first so that the goal becomes easy to attain. This is especially useful for when you have difficulty starting.

It’s easy if you try

For instance, I had an issue with running. I would sit there figuring out what to wear and then spend another 10 minutes scrolling through my playlists and choosing the songs for my run. Then I would look through my fridge for a pre-run snack and spot the delicious leftover burger from the restaurant the night before. The next logical thing to do was to gobble down that burger on the couch!
Instead, I prepare all of this in advance. I prepare my clothing, my playlist, and my snack before I go to bed. The next morning, all of my running gear is ready to go. The preparation comes easy since I know that I won’t have to run right after I’m done.
The author of the post below, Gus Jaramillo, actually changes into his workout clothes when he is off of work. That way, he is ready for the gym before he even gets into his car. The only logical destination becomes the gym.

Start today

Have you ever wanted to take Data Analysis for Genomics at Harvard? Well probably not, but now you can as the class starts in early 2014. If Poetry in America: Whitman is a course that more interests you, sign up now as class begins on January 15th at the edx MOOC.

Various MOOC offerings

Corporate America is now jumping at these ideas and are giving incentives for their employees to take these course and have incorporated them into their corporate training programs. In a recent survey by Future Workplace, 70% of HR and Learning professionals said they saw opportunities to integrate MOOCs into their own company’s learning program.

There are many, but here are my favorite.
https://www.coursera.org/
http://www.udacity.com/
https://www.edx.org/
If you enroll in a course, I wouldn’t run out and by a Harvard alumni sweater, but you can still get America’s highest quality education for free. Many questions are still surrounding the MOOC. Will the MOOC transform the way we look at education? Are schools and universities ready to accept these free online courses as transferable credit? What impact will MOOC’s have on the cost of education? Although many of these questions are yet to be fully realized, we know that they are growing and aren’t going away anytime soon.
Gus is a Learning and Performance Professional at the Ken Blanchard Companies and is currently finishing his PhD in I/O Psychology. He can be reached at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

I didn’t really know what that all entailed, but after having to get up on the first day at 4:00AM, I had a pretty good idea of what I was getting myself into. Picking strawberries in the summer in Oregon sounds pretty romantic, but cold mornings, long days, and PB&J for lunch every day is a less than thrilling experience. Plus, I was horrible at picking strawberries; I was the worst strawberry picker they had hired that summer and probably the worst one in the history of that farm. After a few weeks, one of the farm managers said, “Hey Gus, we like you, but we don’t like the way you work.” Yikes!

Working hard- A skill worth having

Aside from the fact that I almost lost my job at 12 years old, I made $180.00 dollars that summer and to this day, I still don’t think I’ve spent it. I always make sure my bank account doesn’t go below $180.00. But really, I earned a lot more than the money I made that summer. I earned a sense of the importance of hard work. And that is what I truly feel is not being communicated to the older generations. I say communicated because I feel that while Gen X and Y are truly hard workers, the message they communicate is perceived much differently. The younger leaders of today are quite frankly a lot more demanding. They want more time off to spend with their family, want a work-life balance that allows them to work from home from time to time, and want autonomy in their roles.  These are the same people who saw their mothers and fathers work for a company their whole lives only to be laid off and left on unemployment. So, I don’t blame them (myself).

Established leaders in the organization want to hear this: “I will work for it.” That’s what they were told as young leaders and it embodies the values they hold on to dearly. So give it the good ol’ college try. You will be surprised at what opportunities may be given to you if the boss knows you’re going to give it all you got.

Gus is a Learning and Performance Professional at the Ken Blanchard Companies and is currently finishing his PhD in I/O Psychology. He can be reached at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

Fast Keyboarding

www.kenblanchard.com

Done? Ok. Now, let’s go to the same website, but using the keyboard. Here are the instructions (read them first before performing them):

1. Highlight the web address above with your mouse
2. Hold down the CTRL (PC) or Command (Mac) button on your keyboard
3. Hit the following letters: c, t, v
4. Let go of the CTRL (PC) or Command (Mac) button
5. Hit the ENTER button on your keyboard

Which was faster? Hopefully the keyboard shortcuts were (hence the term shortcuts)! There are a tremendous amount of things we do on the computer on a daily basis that can be done with keyboard shortcuts, and shaving off a few seconds here or a minute there can really add up to huge time savings!
To start, I would recommend memorizing ALT+TAB, which allows you to switch to your last open application window. Here is a video of this shortcut in action. Now, you can keep your focus on the center of the screen and not have to hunt down the application icon at the bottom!
I find it most effective to learn one shortcut a week and to use it as much as possible during that week. And hand positioning is important as well. Here are some common ways I’ve seen right-handed people hit shortcuts with their left hand:

Of course, you don’t have to start with ALT+TAB! Look up shortcuts for any actions or functions that you do often that you’d like to perform quickly, like sending the email you’re writing in Outlook (ALT+S) or bolding a word (CTRL+B). Once they become ingrained, you may find yourself zipping along, having more spare time, and loving computing so much more.
If you have any trouble finding a particular shortcut or need any additional help, post in the comments below. Happy shortcutting!

A collaborative approach

• It’s effective. Real, true behavioral change has been proven in organizations that utilize peer coaching. There are no gimmicks with this approach; if implemented correctly and sustained, it is a great tool for development.
• It’s free. Although executive coaching has its place, not many of us can afford coaches and most organizations won’t have the resources to supply everyone with a coach. Peer coaching is a free coaching experience that is results-based and is grounded in the interaction with people you know and trust.
• It’s an easy process to implement. Set up a recurring time and place within your organization to meet and discuss your current goals. This might be a perfect place to discuss your performance management goals or individual development plan (IDP) that your manager has set for you. If your organization isn’t ready for you to use working hours to implement this, than a 1 hour lunch break will work perfectly. It will probably be the most effective lunch hour you will have that week!

Gus is a Learning and Performance Professional at the Ken Blanchard Companies and is currently finishing his PhD in I/O Psychology. He can be reached at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

The leaders I met, whatever walk of life they were from, whatever institutions they were presiding over, always referred back to the same failure – something that happened to them that was personally difficult, even traumatic, something that made them feel that desperate sense of hitting bottom–as something they thought was almost a necessity. It’s as if at that moment the iron entered their soul; that moment created the resilience that leaders need.
-Warren Bennis

Brian Alexander is the Marketing Project Specialist with The Ken Blanchard Companies. To learn more about The Ken Blanchard Companies please visit www.kenblanchard.com

So, of course, they decided to sleep in and didn’t do any physical training for the day.
And of course my team was upset that they didn’t get to sleep in and come to work at 9:30. The last thing I wanted to create was resentment across the two teams. I thought that maybe a “team building” exercise was in order, but I didn’t carry it out because I felt I would probably screw that up too.  I was upset about the whole situation, but mainly I was irritated at myself.
After looking back on the incident, here’s what I learned:

• I never really gave him full autonomy

Here’s what I really said: You can have full autonomy unless you do something I don’t want you to do or something that I disagree with you on. What I told him he could do and what I wanted him to do were two separate things.

• I shouldn’t have given him full autonomy

Giving full autonomy over everything is not really leadership at all. I thought I was doing the right thing by giving him autonomy, but what I should have done in that situation was to give him more direction as to what is expected and necessary. Autonomy has its place and limitations; using it correctly is when it’s the most impactful.

• My communication was not aligned with my expectations

I was never clear on my expectations. What was standard and status quo for me was not necessarily the same for him. Talking through each other’s expectations would have been helpful for minimizing conflict and building trust.
For any further information or questions contact me at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

When the stars line up perfectly, you have a great boss and your growth and success seem assured.  You have a person who guides and directs you, supports you, listens to you, laughs with you, shares disappointments with you, and brainstorms solutions with you. You have a leader who sets your goals and career path, opens doors, shares insights, paints the future picture and provides hope.  As the country song goes, “You’re gonna miss this.”

What can you do when you learn you will lose your best boss? Here are some actions you can take to keep an element of control and keep your career on track.

Download. Proactively set up time to gather important information and advice from your boss. What is the big-picture plan? What are the important projects, steps, and details? Ask for career advice relative to your company. The short term left for your boss may create a safer space to share more openly and honestly.

Mine. I have always believed that there is opportunity in chaos and churn. With some digging you may uncover new ideas, vistas or needs. There may be a promotion for you in this wave of change.  Are there projects you can take over? Could a conversation be had about reorganizing your department? Discuss possibilities proactively with your boss’s boss.

Interview. Ask to be part of the interview process to find your next boss. Prepare a list of benefits to your being on the interview panel. For instance, you know the makeup of the team and the projects in process. You have a unique ability to gauge cultural fit.  You deserve to be part of the process. Believe it—and ask for it.

Stay positive. As a manager, it is your job to soften the blow of the news for your team. If you admired your boss, it is likely others did too. Steer the ship through this choppy sea. Model confidence in the future, keep people focused, and provide hope.

Emulate. If your boss is someone you will remember ask yourself what made her so special. What did she do or say that brought out the best in you? How did he navigate the system for the good of the team? How did she break through obstacles while maintaining positive relationships? What made him wise? Remember and emulate the impressive characteristics, habits, relationships and style your good boss had.  Notice, learn, emulate, repeat.

Losing a terrific leader can shake up anyone. If you accept and manage the new normal, you’ll survive, New Manager, and so will your team.

About the author:

Cathy Huett is Director, Professional Services at The Ken Blanchard Companies.  This is the fourth in a series of posts specifically geared toward new and emerging leaders.

But what happens if the environment is altered and obstacles are added? Researchers experimented with just that by lowering a glass barrier into the aquarium separating the pike on one side from food fish on the other. When the pike goes after a nearby minnow, it runs into the invisible divider. And after a while, the pike stops trying.

But this gets even more interesting. The observers next remove the glass, and the pike continues to avoid going after its natural food.  The learned behavior is so strong that some pike have actually died of starvation during the experiment even while minnows continue to brush up against them.

This same type of learned behavior can sometimes be seen at work. It’s a learned helplessness that occurs when you, or someone with influence over you, decides that something can’t be done, or perhaps in the case of business, can’t be done right. In short, the Pike Syndrome is a debilitating situation.

For example, if someone approaches you for feedback on a project or job they’ve been working on, and rather than emphasizing what was done well, you point out what could have been done better. Even if you were right in your critique, almost inevitably there are potential negative consequences.

Or, possibly you are the type of manager who tells people, “If you’re doing your job, you’ll never see me.” When that’s the case, good work goes unrecognized and it is only shortcomings that draw a response from the supervisor.

When good performers experience that type of environment, they learn to avoid their leader’s dissatisfaction rather than risking new behavior that might lead to better results. In the longer term, it may be difficult for them to unlearn that.

So avoid being part of the problem. Give your people their best chance to succeed by removing barriers to performance.  Next, acknowledge them when they are making progress. One more thing … it’s critical to get your own behavior in line, before you can help others to do the same.

About the author

Dr. Dick Ruhe is a best-selling author, keynote speaker, and senior consulting partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies. You can read his posts here on LeaderChat the fourth Saturday of each month.

***

Cheryl DePonte is a Human Resources Learning and Performance Specialist at The Ken Blanchard Companies and has over 15 years experience in the fields of organizational effectiveness and human resources development.

 “We know what we are, but know not what we may be.” —William Shakespeare

When recently opening a package of Green Tea, the quote, “It’s not a privilege to know others. Know yourself. That’s a privilege,” was attached to the string. Perhaps the tea manufacture was having a caffeinated paraphrasing of a Lao Tzu philosophy to push the notion that you’ll some how be more enlightened when you drink this potion.

Self Reflection?

Recently, I decided to try some new ways to be more productive and less stressed:

1. Spa water – in a scientific study, those who were fully-hydrated had improved mood and were less sleepy. So, I decided to try drinking spa water (sometimes called “infused water”) and I’m hooked. You get your water in for the day and it’s flavored without all the calories and chemicals. Refill as needed and enjoy. Here is a wikihow on how to make spa water:

How to make spa water

2. Concentration Music – it is said that listening to baroque classical music has been scientifically shown to improve mood, productivity, and concentration. So, I decided to give it a whirl and wouldn’t you know, it works! I get more work done faster and more precisely while being relaxed the entire time. Gotta love classical music! Here is a sample for your listening pleasure:

3. A Timer – scientific studies also show we have a limited attention span for tasks. This time has varied in studies anywhere from 10 minutes to up to 40 minutes. So, I set a timer and only worked on a task for a specified period and then took a break. I also used a timer to go back and forth between tasks. This has worked wonders for getting many more things done in a day than I could have imagined. A link to a fabulous, easy-to-set online timer:
Online Timer
These tips for containing the crazy work well for my own personal work style and help me to be a more calm, productive, and focused leader.
Share with us your tips to contain the crazy, increase productivity, and reduce stress. No matter how unique they may be, please share! What works for you?

The quick answer is:  It’s about both you and your team. There are two ways to look at your new role.

First, it’s about you. It’s about you in terms of your ability to show the way, provide hope, stay optimistic, and be a positive role model. It’s about your willingness to listen well to your people and hear their concerns and new ideas. It’s about you having the courage to say what needs to be said—to your people, your peers or your boss—on behalf of your team.  It’s about you using your corporate machete to create career paths for your people through your company’s jungle. It’s about teaching and explaining (again) and supporting and encouraging (always).  It’s about noticing the true condition of your most valuable corporate resource—the people under your care.

Second, it’s about them. Are your people’s roles and goals clear?  Do they have a voice and a forum with you to express themselves? Your direct reports are ambitious. They want to know they can trust you with their careers and that you have their best interests at heart. They want to know their time with you is well spent. They want to know the vision and the plan. They want to learn and grow. It’s about them and whether they stay—stay working for your company, stay with you in your department, stay loyal, stay engaged, stay positive, stay current, and stay successful.

No one says becoming a good manager is easy. But it’s not so tricky if you believe at your core that your job is to help others succeed and that, by so doing, you too will succeed. Ken Blanchard asks this question to those who aspire to leadership: “Are you here to serve or to be served?”  Your response to Ken’s question will set the tone for your new management career.

For new managers, there are many ways to leave a positive mark.  Look at what your people need from you and look inside yourself for ways to meet their needs. Ironically, meeting their needs will, in turn, meet your needs as a new manager.

About the author:

Cathy Huett is Director, Professional Services at The Ken Blanchard Companies.  This is the second in a series of posts specifically geared toward new and emerging leaders.

Ok, so we like to watch a little TV and play video games, so what’s the big deal? We live life on the edge (of reality) and love to surf (the web) and socialize (on Facebook) all day. We are the doers. We seek not war, but peace. We love reality television and hang on every word they say (even the illiterate ones). We are not better than any of you, but we are special. Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube are just extensions of our inner self. We love rap music, iPhones, and Dancing with the Stars (my wife made me put that in here). We are not all about ourselves; everyone is just all about us.
This is our motto.
Tom Brokaw accurately named the World War II generation as the Greatest Generation. After reading the book, watching the Band of Brothers series, and hearing the stories from WWII vets themselves, I can’t deny this. These men and women were some of the purist of Americans—hard-working, dedicated, and loyal to their values. I remember visiting Normandy about 10 years ago and seeing the crosses of the buried soldiers neatly displayed—such a beautiful display of sadness and pain. In my own experience as a captain in the Army and a combat veteran serving in Afghanistan, I hardly saw any sense of entitlement among the troops. There were men and women who were generally unhappy to be there (I admit even sometimes I wondered why we were there),  and hated everything about the war, but they still wanted to fight. There was a sense of pride about them and they fought long and hard. While in Afghanistan, I had a West Point Captain tell me about his 18-month deployment. He said the length of the deployment really hit him hard at the first Thanksgiving dinner. They were just about to start eating when one of his soldiers said, “Hey sir, don’t worry about saying grace. I’ll do it this year and you can say grace next year.”
I don’t claim we are the Greatest Generation but I do think Gen Y has contributed significantly more than just TV and video games. We are a young generation, but like many others we adapt, overcome, and move on. I never liked the label, “entitlement generation” because frankly I don’t think we deserve it. I hope this generation can rid ourselves of this brand and demonstrate the core American qualities that have been delivered to us from previous generations.
For any further information or questions contact me at gus.jaramillo@kenblanchard.com

• Your potential is limitless only you set boundaries on your success
• Always assume full responsibility of your actions
• Seek to be the best at what you do
• Find a role-model who exemplifies the skills and character you aspire to possess
• Nothing ever goes as planned so stay flexible
• Stay in the present moment
• Develop a warm-up routine that prepares you mentally and physically for any challenge ahead
• Seize the opportunity in front of you, it may only show itself once
• Push yourself and your team beyond what is believed to be possible
• Listen to your teammates with an open mind but act on your final instincts
• Wins and losses are a byproduct of the process; focus on the process
• Learn from a loss;  do not dwell on it
• Celebrate success and find a way to replicate it

If you believe in yourself have dedication and pride and never quit, you’ll be a winner. The price of victory is high but so are the rewards.
-Paul “Bear” Bryant

Interested in learning how some of leaderships top thought leaders manage to accomplish more tasks in less time? Visit www.leadershiplivecast.com to register today for The Ken Blanchard Companies next free event “Doing Still More with Less” on April 24^th.

• 52% believe their workplace environment helps them innovate.
• 26% believe their organization’s leadership encourages innovation and idea sharing regardless of organizational hierarchy.

That’s a huge gap in the number of Millennials who feel innovation is critical, yet who also feel their leadership teams aren’t fostering cultures of innovation.
Where does your company leadership stand on innovation?  Do you believe that innovation comes only from the top?  Should new ideas be shared and implemented based on seniority, or do employees on the frontlines have opportunities to innovate?
A lot of this deals with change.   Well-established companies may be struggling with an old way of thinking that leadership is where all of the good ideas are generated.  53% of respondents perceived that newer businesses were better able to innovate compared to older businesses.
In reality, innovation should come from all levels.  Innovation shouldn’t be thought of as flowing in a pyramid starting at the top.  Instead, think of innovation spreading across a level playing field in an organization.
Frontline employees who work directly with customers are often the ones who see areas for change.  They can spot problems with processes and even products and services.  They’re the ones who hear the most feedback from customers.    That makes them a great source of new ideas.
How do you know if your employees feel they can innovate?  Can they come to you and/or other company leadership and bring up new ideas for products, processes, and solutions?  Do you have any established process for those ideas to be shared?  Are you open to listening to those ideas, or are they quickly dismissed regardless of how innovative they may be?
There are various other studies/surveys that have shown Millennials are less “loyal” in staying with a single employer.  In other words, if they aren’t getting what they perceive is essential to their work environment, they are more likely to find employment elsewhere compared to the other generations.
In seeing how important Millennials feel innovation is, this could also lead to a possible conclusion that businesses who don’t foster a culture of innovation will have a hard time retaining talent from this generation.
There are some other key data points in the Millennial Innovation survey:

• 66% of respondents agreed that innovative organizations will be better positioned to attract talent.
• Innovation was considered a top reason for the purpose of business.
• Employee satisfaction and retention was ranked as the #1 non-financial  measurement for business success (the interesting part about this is that this category could be further broken down by the Employee Work Passion survey published by The Ken Blanchard Companies on what factors affect employee satisfaction).

No matter where you are in your organization’s hierarchy, what are you doing to foster innovation?
Leave your comments!

As a leader, how do you judge which learning modality will lead to the most effective, quality learning experience? How do you appeal to learners on your teams at differing levels of technological savviness without discouraging their development? Or, worse, avoid humiliating anyone who is not as technologically savvy while simultaneously avoid disengaging your digital learners? Preventing yet more training materials being set up on a shelf never to be used again is key!

Steps you can take to lead your team to effectively use technology to learn include:

1. Understanding how your team learns – Become intimately familiar with how your team learns. Do you offer a learning product on a flash drive only to find you run out before you can order more or are you scheduling face-to-face classes on their behalf with little resistance? Are your most productive employees viewing recording links from live stream workshops because they want to learn in their own time in the comfort of their office? How your employees learn will help you intuit in what form content should be delivered to increase learning. Don’t discount your own observations regarding what your employees seem to gravitate toward.
2. Determine their favored modalities – Fit how the content is offered to the learner by offering it in various forms such as audio, video, face-to-face, and asynchronous. Have a workshop that you know learners on your team will love but know it’s in a format they won’t be interested in learning from? Encourage your employees to determine if they would be interested in learning the same content in a different modality. If the content is off the shelf, inquire as to whether it is offered as mp3, asynchronous, and face-to-face format. Purchase and offer multiple forms and see which format your team seems to prefer. Learn from your purchases and take note of what your employees want more of and most often request.
3. Then…limit options – mp3 audio books, asynchronous learning groups, virtual book clubs , CDs, DVDs, hard-copy libraries, face-to-face workshops…the list goes on as to how employees learn and you could potentially intimidate and confuse learners by creating modality overload. Most important after determining how your team learns is to introduce new technology and options slowly by choosing their favored modality. Then, let them get comfortable with change by limiting the options offered to those two or three favorite modalities the team gravitates toward. Don’t get caught up with the new, shinny technology if you know your employees will most likely not be interested in learning in that particular format. Perhaps you have determined your team enjoys reading hard-copy books, listening to CDs, and asynchronous learning. Invest in these three modalities by allowing your employees to show you this is how they most feel comfortable learning. If the content is then offered as a webinar with live chat, don’t spring it on the team. Wait to allow them to lead you in their own learning.
Understanding how your employees learn will help increase the benefits derived from learning in modalities that best fit the learner and resultantly most benefit the organization.
***

Cheryl DePonte is a Human Resources Learning and Performance Specialist at The Ken Blanchard Companies and has over 15 years experience in the fields of organizational effectiveness and human resources development.

It’s important to remember that you have a choice to control who, what, and how you let the world affect you. It is vital that you develop a daily routine so you can find the time you need to shut out the world for a few minutes and focus on yourself.
Use these three times during your work day to create a productive routine:
The first 30 minutes at the office:

• Be social with work colleagues. Ask people how they are doing and be prepared to dive deeper into their answers.
• Write out your top-of-mind tasks and prioritize them for the day. Be sure to revisit and check them off the list as they are completed.
• Most Importantly, DO NOT CHECK YOUR EMAIL OR SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS. Don’t seek out additional tasks first thing in the morning – more often than not, they will only overwhelm you more than you already may be.

The Lunch Hour:

• Read for recreation to put your mind at ease. Distract yourself with non-work related material so that when you go back to work you have a clean, fresh perspective.
• Go for a walk outside. Connect with nature to clear your mind and re-connect with the world outside of the office.
• Work on a home project. If you have a list of to-do’s, use a portion of this time to schedule service appointments or plan out your home project.

The first 10 minutes of your drive home:

• Praise yourself on your accomplishments. Take a few moments to think about what you achieved during the day. This act emphasizes the importance of mindfulness.
• Formulate a mental outline of tomorrow’s task list. Once you have a picture in your mind you can come in the next day and write it out.
• Prepare to be fully present for your spouse and children. Separate your work and home life by embracing the time you spend with your family. Give them your full attention.

Finding the time for yourself requires dedication and directed focus. Once you hone your prioritizing skills you will find a sense of relief and satisfaction. Your productivity will increase while your stress levels will decrease because you are organized, optimizing your ability to lead yourself.

“This is the key to time management – to see the value of every moment.”
– Menachem Mendel Schneerson

 
If you are feeling overwhelmed and inundated with more and more tasks at work, you are not alone! Visit www.leadershiplivecast.com and register for The Ken Blanchard Companies next livecast, Doing ‘Still’ More With Less, where some of the most respected leadership experts will share their thoughts on the topic!

The total program included modules around personality, values, organization vision and alignment, leadership style, high performing teams, change management, and motivation—the gamut.

This final module consisted of five one-hour-long group presentations about various aspects of their learning journey and its impact on people, process, and results. We asked about personal insights, how they applied their learning to real work, and what the human and economic impacts were of such application. And finally, in terms of their development, we asked them what they wanted to do next.

In terms of roles, the “what’s next” question revealed an array of ambitions. One wants to be CEO within 10 years. Another wants to lead the expansion of engineering capabilities in the African subsidiaries. And a third sees a future in corporate strategy with the aim of improving how global change initiatives are conceived and executed.

What was most beautiful was not the ambitions themselves, although I often feel their gravitational pull compelling me to double-check my own goals and velocity toward them. Instead, the most heartening aspect of their ambitions was how they promised to approach them.

Reduce Pressure to Go Fast

Whereas in the past, on their way to greater roles and responsibilities, these executives would have passed the pressure they received from their bosses to others in direct proportion—or even amplify it—now they realize that pressure often does more harm than good. The motivation research shows that pressure is easily internalized as a form of control, which then undermines a person’s eagerness to perform an act voluntarily and with an optimistic sense of purpose. In other words, pressure creates a negative Motivational Outlook, which slows the pace and quality of work in the moment and in the long run.

These executives also described how they helped even very senior employees build additional competence faster than before, and how those employees then displayed increased confidence that they could handle even more-complex projects. It was nice to hear, too, how the quality of their relationships improved as a result.

Executives take a lot of heat—much of it deserved—for leading as if people do not matter much. So, I decided to share this with you because I wonder what you think when you read about executives who have dedicated themselves to leading in challenging times with boldness, grace, warmth, ever-increasing skill, and maturity. How does it inspire you or catalyze new thinking about how you lead?

It was a privilege to watch these leaders commit to a truly human—and humane—approach to leading others, and to see that by actually doing it things are already improving for them and everyone around them. Sometimes it is nice to take a break and simply enjoy watching people flower and shine right in front of our very eyes. I thought you might enjoy that, too.

About the author:

The Motivation Guy  (also known as Dr. David Facer)  is one of the principal authors—together  with Susan Fowler and Drea Zigarmi—of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ new Optimal Motivation process and workshop.  Their posts appear on the first and third Monday of each month.

Image courtesy of http://www.simpsoncrazy.com

• Mr. Burns (The Simpsons) – Let’s start with one of the most infamous and iconic leaders in cartoons.  Most people will recognize this power-hungry nuclear tycoon.  Some could say he’s a wealthy businessman (depending on which episode you’re watching), but if you’re an employee under Burns’ leadership, you better watch out.  He’s the perfect example of a self-serving leader only looking out for his own best interests.  The employees do get some nice perks (naps during work hours, anyone?), but I’m betting there’s a high turnover rate at that power plant.  Don’t say the wrong thing around this one, or he may “release the hounds.”
• Mr. Slate (The Flintstones) – Mr. Slate actually isn’t that bad of a leader.  In fact, he seemed to have an ok working relationship with Fred.  However, he has no patience for Fred’s mistakes.  He likes to fire Fred on a regular basis.  Instead of firing and re-hiring an employee consistently, he should spend more time giving Fred some direction.  Yabba-Dabba don’t do this.
• Spencer Cogswell (The Jetsons) – While George Jetson’s boss, Cosmo Spacely, has his own set of problems (another leader who loves to fire and re-hire his employees), he doesn’t compare to their infamous competitor Cogswell.  This leader isn’t above stealing other’s ideas or firing employees for little-to-no reason.  Stop this crazy thing!
• Professor Farnsworth (Futurama) – He might be a great individual contributor since he always seem to invent something you need just at the right time, but watch out if you report to him!  This leader has a tendency to sleep on the job, especially when you need something from him.  For the most part, he’s honest with you, but he has a habit of forgetting to mention important details, especially in challenging and even dangerous situations.  He also doesn’t provide a lot of support when you need it most.  You might find a better leader on Omicron Persei 8.
• Pointy-haired Boss (Dilbert) – If you could think of all the stereotypes of bad leaders and ball them under one individual, you’d get the Pointy-haired Boss.  Can you say “demotivated?”  He says and does everything the wrong way.   He usually makes uneducated decisions and most of them are highly unethical.  HR probably has a whole filing cabinet dedicated to just him.  Don’t expect any direction, support, or any input, for that matter.  It’s time to start combing your own hair to a point if you want him to notice you in a favorable light.

The Good

• Splinter (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) – You could argue that Leonardo is the leader of the green machine, but at the end of the day, who do they actually report to?  That’s right, it’s the wise rat.   He always seems to support his team the right way.  In fact, I don’t recall Splinter ever making any real leadership mistakes/gaffes.  Sure, he gets captured by the Foot Clan, but who doesn’t?  He’s more than just a great leader since he’s also a father-figure.  Don’t get caught goofing off on the job, though.  You might find yourself doing 10 flips.
• Optimus Prime (Transformers) – Yes, it’s the infamous leader of the Autobots.  This leader fights for righteousness every step of the way.  He could’ve landed on Earth an only thought about his own problems.  Instead, he protects all forms of life.  He’d sacrifice himself before sacrificing others.  He’s a cross-species(?) kind of leader and has all the servant leader qualities.  Roll out!
• Keith (Voltron) – Keith is a good example of a leader who follows the GROW acronym.  He likes to read in order to educate himself and he always thinks about how he can improve.  He’s another leader that looks out for his team.  Need to form the head?  Don’t worry, Keith has you covered.
• Papa Smurf (The Smurfs) – This is another leader who also has a parental role.  He deeply cares and loves those who follow him.  He helps those that have made mistakes or need guidance.  Yes, he’ll get upset if his orders aren’t followed, but when the health and safety of the village rests in your hands, it’s easy to understand.  Isn’t that Smurfy?
• Lucky (Pound Puppies) – If you watched the Pound Puppies during the 80’s, you might not know Lucky.  Lucky is actually the leader on the new version of Pound Puppies.  This is the leader my own daughter would pick.  While he commands respect (he is the alpha dog of the show, after all), he still does it without coming off as rude or mean.  He cares about his crew, helps them in any way he can, and is always willing to do what’s necessary.  Once a Pound Puppy, always a Pound Puppy!

What other cartoon leader makes a good or bad role model from your point of view?  What makes them stand out from the rest?
(After compiling this list, I realize that it is composed of all-male characters and it could use more balance.  If you can think of female characters that have good or bad leadership qualities, please leave them in the comments section).
Leave your comments!

For the past several weeks (and several weeks ahead for procrastinators) managers around the world have been meeting with their direct reports to review last year’s goals, measure performance, and determine pay increases.

If you are in the middle of performance reviews with your people, here are two radical ideas inspired by a recent article Scott and Ken Blanchard wrote for Fast Company, The Best Gift Managers Can Give Their Employees This Season.

In the article, Scott and Ken identified that two of the most important ingredients missing in today’s manager-direct report conversations are growth and considering the employee’s agenda.

In some ways, that’s not surprising considering the cautious way most companies have been operating during our slow, tepid economic recovery.  “Just lucky to have a job,” has become institutionalized after four years of a weak employment picture and little or no growth in many industries.

But 2013 feels different.  There’s a small, but flickering sense of optimism in the air.  (Maybe it’s because that Mayan calendar scare is over—it is, isn’t it?)

Are you ready to move forward?  Here are three new ways of thinking.  How could you add these components into your next performance management or goal setting conversation either as a manager or direct report?

1. Think growth.  Yes, GROWTH!  It’s time.  People can only tread water for so long.  Eventually, you have to start swimming somewhere.  Developing new skills in your present job—and seeing the next step on your career path are both important factors that lead to happiness, well-being and better performance at work.  What can you add to your list of skills during the coming year?  What move can you make (even a small one) that will get you one step closer to your next career objectives?
2. Think connection. Who can help you along the way?  There is only so much that you can do on your own and left to your own devices.  We all need some help.
3. Think helping others. The late Zig Ziglar (who passed away earlier this year) was famous for identifying that, “You can get just about anything you want out of life as long as you are willing to help others get what they want.” But it has to begin with you.  Who can you reach out to this week or next?  Who can you help take the next step toward their career plans?

In their article for Fast Company Scott and Ken Blanchard share an important paradox for anyone in business to remember.  The more you give, the more that comes back to you.

Add a little bit of giving into your work conversations in 2013.  Talk about growth issues with your direct reports.  Find out how you can help.  You’ll be surprised at how much comes back to you during the course of the year.

Optimal Motivation

Victoria has a very special and very feisty cat that likes to be petted, but only on its head.  Miss the mark and you are likely to receive a hiss and a toothy kiss.

Gary recently rescued an equally special and feisty dog from the middle of a road near his home.  Now he is wondering how big it will get and how high the new fence needs to be.

I told about a gecko that lived under my refrigerator.

We also talked about research—and personal experience—of the effects of patient interaction with animals such as petting a dog or cat (or ferret, I suppose) on blood pressure (reduction) and mood (improvement).

Beyond the obvious suggestion to allow employees to bring their dog or cat to work once in a while (which may be impractical), I couldn’t help but wonder, what creative new programs could we create in 2013 that would bring similar health and well-being benefits?

This is where the games come in.  Jay enjoys playing Mexican Train with family and friends.  Jim and Drea enjoy bridge and pinochle.  Susan enjoys Words with Friends.  As we talked about the games we love, we talked about our heightened sense of well-being while playing them.  The benefits include intense concentration, connectedness with the people we play with, exercising our strategic skills, and feeling proud when we improve our competence.

Don’t we want these same benefits for our employees in their everyday work, too?

Influencing well-being

So, let’s get specific.  What creative new programs could you start in 2013 to help employees experience:

• A sense of passion
• Ever expanding competence
• Continual growth and learning
• Strong positive relationships, and
• A sense of pride for performing well?

Here are some things to consider as you think outside the box.  The Optimal Motivation dimensions are in parentheses:

1. Focus the program on enriching employees’ sense of well-being and enjoyment at work.  (Well-being)
2. Allow employees to opt-in, and publically celebrate all participants.  (Autonomy and Relatedness)
3. Encourage senior executives to participate alongside everyone else. (Relatedness and Competence)
4. While establishing teams or groups, minimize competition.  Make sure all teams are cross-functional only, with no teams by single roles, ranks, divisions, or departments.  (Relatedness and Competence)
5. Emphasize camaraderie rather than competition.   (Relatedness)
6. If you allow a monthly Pet at Work day, structure some fun activities like Stupid Pet Tricks, or Silly Pet Uniform contest.  Keep it light and fun.  (Relatedness and Well-being)
7. Make sure to allow time in the workday for all activities.  (Autonomy and Relatedness)

Let us know what you decide and how it goes.  And as ever, we wish you energy, vitality, and well-being in all you do.

Happy Holidays.

About the author:

The Motivation Guy  (also known as Dr. David Facer)  is one of the principal authors—together  with Susan Fowler and Drea Zigarmi—of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ new Optimal Motivation process and workshop.  Their posts appear on the first and third Monday of each month.

A best-selling business book (and one that I had never heard of until earlier this month) addresses a key piece of the accountability issue.  Leadership and Self-Deception was first published in 2000 and then re-issued as a second edition in 2010.  The book has sold over 1,000,000 copies since it was published and sales have grown every year since it was first “discovered” by HR, OD, and change practitioners.

What makes the book so different (and hard to describe) is that it looks at work behavior as fundamentally an inside-out proposition.  We basically act out externally what we are feeling inside.  Bad behavior externally—doing just enough to get by, compliance instead of commitment, and putting self-interest ahead of team or department goals—are justified because of the way that that colleagues, managers, and senior leaders are acting in return.

The folks at The Arbinger Institute, the corporate authors of the book, call this “in the box thinking” and they believe it is the root cause of many of the problems being experienced at work today.

Is your organization stuck “in the box?”

Wondering if negative attitudes inside might be causing poor accountability on the outside in your organization? Here are a couple of questions to ask yourself.

• Where are the trouble spots in your organization?  Where are people getting the job done but it seems to always be at minimum level of performance—and with a low sense of enthusiasm and morale?
• What are the possible attitudes and beliefs among members of that team or department that make them feel justified in their behaviors?  Why do they feel it is okay to narrow the scope of their job, focus on their own agenda, and do only what’s required to stay out of trouble—but not much more?
• What can you do to break the cycle of negative thinking that keeps people “in the box?”

Climbing out of the box

Surprisingly, the answer to breaking out of the box starts with expecting more of yourself and others. People climb into the box when they decide to do less than their best.  The folks at Arbinger describe this as “self-betrayal” and it sets in motion all sorts of coping strategies that end up with self-focused behaviors.  Don’t let that happen in your organization.  Here are two ways that you can help people see beyond their self interests.

1. Constantly remind people of the bigger picture and their role in it.  Set high standards and hold people accountable to them.
2. Second, and just as important, provide high levels of support and encouragement for people to do the right thing.  Make it easy for people to put the needs of the team, department, and organization ahead of their own.  Look at reward, recognition, and compensation strategies.  Look at growth and career planning.  What can you do to free people up to focus on the needs of others instead of themselves?

Change behavior by changing beliefs

Accountability is a tough issue to address because most people feel justified in their actions and opinions.  Don’t let your people self-justify their way into lower performance.  It’s not good for them and it’s not good for your organization.  Lead people to higher levels of performance.  Help people find the best in themselves.

“Shocking,” he exclaimed again before I could put up the second part of the slide. I asked the obvious question, “Why is this so shocking?” His reply: “My whole career I have been told my job was to motivate my people, now you tell me I can’t. No wonder I’ve been so frustrated.”

I revealed the second part of the slide: What managers can do is create an environment where people are more likely to experience optimal motivation at work.

Now this may not seem so shocking if you accept that motivation is truly an inside-out job–only an individual can determine how they are motivated. And it may be obvious that a manager’s role is to create a workplace where people can experience positive motivation. But the manager’s initial shock led to an exploration of the latest science of motivation that you might also find useful.

Over the years it has become evident that most managers do not understand how to create that motivating environment. Throwing their arms up in despair, they assumed motivating people depended on things mostly outside their managerial control such as good wages, promotions, and job security. Managers defaulted to HR to come up with better compensation schemes, more creative reward and recognition systems, and elite high potential programs.

But now we know better. If you hope to motivate–or create that motivational environment–for your staff through raises, bonuses, annual awards, or promotions, you are pinning your hopes on false promises. I can hear HR managers breathing a collective sigh of relief at the same time as they are thinking: But what do managers do differently?

Here are three things to stop doing that undermine optimal motivation and how to use the new science of motivation to make a positive difference:

1. Stop depending on your authority and hierarchical power and find ways to give your people a greater sense of autonomy. Start giving people a sense of choice by helping them generate alternative actions and solutions, discussing implications for various approaches to problems, and providing freedom within boundaries whenever possible.
2. Stop thinking business isn’t personal. Turn the old axiom around: If it is business, it must be personal. Learn how to have effective challenging conversations, take note of personal issues that may be influencing a person’s performance on any given day, and be willing to share personal stories that are relevant to work and goals.
3. Stop focusing on what was achieved today and ask instead: What did people learn today? One of the greatest joys of being a manager is also being a great teacher. If your people go home each day having learned one new thing, they will not be the only ones feeling rewarded that day–you will also find a greater sense of accomplishment and purpose in your work.

The good news is that through the latest science of motivation, we have a good, solid, research-based understanding of what motivates people in the workplace. The other good news is that managers can use that understanding to help their people enjoy a higher quality motivational work experience. And that’s the maybe not-so-shocking truth about motivation.

About the author:

Susan Fowler is one of the principal authors—together  with David Facer and Drea Zigarmi—of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ new Optimal Motivation process and workshop.  Their posts appear on the first and third Monday of each month.

1. I am not really here. (Well, maybe my body is, but my mind is elsewhere.)
2. I am being paid to be here. (And if I wasn’t being paid—or receiving some other type of reward—I wouldn’t be here.)
3. I have to be here; I’d be afraid of what might happen if I wasn’t.
4. Being here aligns with my values and will help me and my organization reach important goals.
5. Being here resonates with me; I feel it could make an important difference to others in my organization and/or help me fulfill a meaningful purpose.
6. I am inherently interested in being here; it is fun for me.

A quick survey found that people were attending for a variety of reasons including all six of the possible choices above. Fowler went on to explain that the first three choices were all “Sub Optimal” motivational outlooks that generated poor results. She also shared that outlooks 4, 5 and 6 were the “Optimal” motivational outlooks that most closely correlated with intentions to perform at a high level, apply discretionary effort, and be a good corporate citizen.

What motivates you?

What’s motivating you on your tasks at work?  Is it a “carrot” (External #2) or a “stick” (Imposed #3) approach?  If so, what’s the impact been on your motivation and performance?  Chances are that you’re not performing at your best.  Even worse, you could find yourself feeling somewhat manipulated and controlled, which rarely brings out the best in people.

For better results, think about what it might mean to employ a more Aligned, Integrated, or Inherent approach.  Find ways to connect the dots for yourself to create a more intrinsically satisfying strategy.

3 ways to enhance motivation

Fowler suggests beginning by evaluating the quality of A-R-C in your life.  Looking back at over 40 years of motivation research, Fowler shared that the answer to creating a more motivating environment is a combination of increased Autonomy (control of your experiences), Relatedness (working together with others), and Competence (developing and refining new skills).  The good news is that anyone can change their motivational outlook with some self-awareness and self-regulation.

Could you use a little more motivation in your life?   Most of us could.  To find out more about Fowler’s thinking on motivation and bringing out the best in yourself and others, be sure to check out Fowler’s free, on-demand webinar recording, A Closer Look at the New Science of Motivation.  You’ll discover some of the common mistakes people make when it comes to motivation and what you can do to improve your outlook.  Recorded on October 3 for an audience of 700 participants, the download is free, courtesy of Cisco WebEx and The Ken Blanchard Companies.

In Blanchard’s experience, all leaders can benefit from examining some of the mindsets that might be operating just below the surface of their consciousness.  It can be as complex as a formal 360-degree assessment, but it can also be accomplished through less formal methods.  As Blanchard explains, “Sometimes all a person needs to do is get on the phone with a completely objective person who has their best interest at heart. Someone who is going to say, ‘Hey, what’s up with that? What’s going on?’”

“And they learn about themselves by talking. It is like cleaning out your closet and getting rid of all the old stuff that doesn’t fit anymore or that you never really liked in the first place.”

3 ways leaders hold themselves back

In an interview for the October edition of Ignite, Blanchard identifies three ways that leaders often hold themselves back.  See if any of these might be hampering your effectiveness as a leader.

Limiting self-beliefs—people often self-impose rules and expectations on themselves that don’t serve them—even when they know what to do differently.  It’s a matter of giving yourself permission. When Blanchard asks, “What keeps you from doing those things?” clients often reply, “Absolutely nothing. It just didn’t occur to me.”

Playing small—Blanchard shares another story about a client who was very comfortable in her own playing field but wasn’t seeing her own potential—or taking steps toward it—the way that others in the organization were seeing her. As a result, she wasn’t building the relationships or networks within the organization that would make her more effective.

Time orientation—finally, Blanchard often works with clients on expanding their time orientations. As she explains, “Each of us has a preferred and habitual time orientation—past, present, or future. Aspiring leaders are often very good at being in the present and focusing on what is right in front of them, but to take it to the next level, they also need to develop skills for future planning.”

Be yourself—only better!

People can and do change. And it almost never requires as big a shift as you might think. Blanchard likes to use the metaphor of a ship on a long sea voyage. If you make even a two-degree change in your direction you completely change your destination.

Where are you headed? What are some of the behaviors that might be holding you back as a leader? To read more on Blanchard’s thinking, be sure to check out Three Ways Leaders Hold Themselves Back.

Interested in learning more about identifying and changing limiting leadership behaviors?

Also check out a special Leadership Livecast on October 10.  Over 40 different business thought leaders will be sharing examples of “un-leaderlike behaviors” and how they—or others—overcame them.  The event is free courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies. Learn more at www.leadershiplivecast.com

It’s called “backward planning” and it begins by imagining where you would like to be in 10 years. Where do you see yourself? From there, you move backward to identify where you need to be in nine years, eight years, etc., to ultimately reach that 10-year goal. In Blanchard’s experience, taking a minute to stop, look around, and think about where you are going can help you identify the moves you need to make right now that will get you one step closer to where you want to be.

In addition to taking a “backward” approach to future career growth, Blanchard also recommends that you think through a four-step checklist to make sure that you have the resources you need to set yourself up for success.  He uses the acronym PLAN to help make it memorable.

Where are you headed?

When was the last time you took a break from the day-to-day to see what direction you are headed in?  Do you have a plan in place for your career success?  If it has been awhile, here are four ways to get back on track.

P stands for People and Praise. Find people you can discuss your career with. Reach out and surround yourself with people who will give you support, honest feedback, and encouragement along the way. Who can you add to your career development team?

L stands for Learning. Open your world and identify resources that will keep you growing. Look inside your work world by exploring online courses and other training and development opportunities. Look outside work for special experiences that can broaden your horizons. What’s a new experience you can add to your resume?

A stands for Assessment. Assess your current strengths, weaknesses, and value in relation to your career possibilities. Are there gaps in your current skills or experience that need to be addressed?

N stands for getting past No. Design strategies for dealing with negative situations such as rejection, obstacles, or failures. Few careers proceed exactly as planned. Failure isn’t fatal and setbacks will occur. How can you build resiliency into your plan to help you learn from negative experiences and move forward?

Take some time to evaluate where you are right now. The most successful people maintain a focus on the present and on the future. To read more of Blanchard’s thinking, check out the Fast Company online article, The Wisdom Of The Two Steps Forward, One Step Back Career Plan

Now, let me be clear that the job of taking ice cream orders really is pretty easy. But imagine being new at the task of scooping rock-hard ice cream into cones without breaking them, or remembering the difference between a shake and a malt—let alone knowing where the heck to find all 31 flavors in the case. It took a bit of time to memorize all of this information.  Then imagine the store full of people on a hot day or after a sporting event, and you have mayhem!

One night during that learning period stands out in particular—not necessarily because of the reasons stated above, but more because of how my manager made me feel during one of those crazy, busy times.

A man came into the store with his daughter, a girl I had met before who went to a rival high school.  She and I said “hi” as I began to help her dad with his order.  He was a very direct sort of guy and started rambling off his order, getting frustrated if I asked him to repeat things along the way.  The last item on his list was a quart of French vanilla ice cream.

After making sure he had everything he needed, I went to the cash register to ring up his order.  Just as I totaled it up, I realized I had charged him for a quart of regular vanilla ice cream instead of French vanilla, which was more expensive.  I immediately called over the manager on duty to help me, since I didn’t know how to delete an order and start over.  As she came over, the man started yelling at me and calling me names because I had made a mistake and was taking too long.  As I was apologizing to him and doing my best not to cry (although my eyes were not cooperating), my manager did the most amazing thing.  She turned to the man and very politely told him that this was my first week on the job, I was still in training, and there is a lot to learn when first starting.  She went on to say it was a very innocent mistake and would be taken care of quickly, but there was no need for him to yell at me.

Even though her words didn’t stop my tears from coming, it was so reassuring to hear her stick up for me.  I actually felt sorry for his daughter—she was so embarrassed by his obnoxious behavior that she put her head down halfway through his order. As they were leaving, she just walked away with a glance at me as if to say, “I am so sorry!”

A lesson for leaders

What my manager did for me that night, and throughout the rest of my training period there, is a great lesson for all leaders.  Without realizing it then, I learned three valuable tips to help leaders build the skills, as well as the confidence, of an employee in training:

1.  Never reprimand a learner.

2.  Let the employee know it’s okay to make mistakes—that you “have their back.”

3.  Praise progress.

My manager showed me she believed in me when she stood up for me at a moment when I really needed it.  She knew the importance of both the external customer and the internal customer.  Her belief in me and willingness to work with me through that interaction with a difficult customer really strengthened our relationship and made me want to work harder for her.

Maybe the customer isn’t always right, but they still are your customer. My manager was a great role model that night for how to treat both external and internal customers with respect.

About the author:

Kathy Cuff is one of the principal authors—together  with Vicki Halsey—of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Legendary Service training program.  Their customer service focused posts appear on the first and third Thursday of each month.

In Fowler’s experience, you have to understand your own reasons for performing at a high level before you can help others do the same. Without that understanding, most managers attempting to “motivate” others will resort to imposed or extrinsic techniques that may only make the matter worse—for example, a “carrot” approach which dangles incentives in front of people in exchange for desired behaviors—or a “stick” approach which applies sanctions and negative consequences for undesired behaviors.

A new understanding on what motivates people

Fowler maintains that the reason for our dependence on external rewards to motivate people, especially in the workplace, is not just because they were easy and the “fast food” of motivation, but because we didn’t have alternatives—we didn’t know what truly motivates people.

That’s been changing rapidly the past couple of years as research about intrinsic motivators have begun to make their way into the work environment.

Building on the pioneering work of Edward Deci and Richard Ryan, researchers and practitioners have begun exploring the powerful impact that intrinsic motivators such as Autonomy (being in control of one’s own life), Relatedness (to interact, be connected to, and experience caring for others) and Competence (experience mastery) can have.

For example, researchers at The Ken Blanchard Companies have established that employee perceptions of increased Autonomy, Relatedness, and Competence are positively correlated to intentions to stay with an organization, endorse the organization as a good place to work, and apply discretionary effort in service of the organization’s goals.

As Fowler explains, “The latest science of motivation gives us an entire spectrum of options beyond the carrot and stick. People want or need money and rewards, but when they believe that is what motivates them, they are missing out on much more effective and satisfying motivational experiences.”

How are you motivated?

Wondering how you can apply this latest research into your own work life?  Here are three area to explore:

1. What’s your motivation? What’s driving your performance on key work goals and tasks—is it in pursuit of rewards, avoidance of punishment, or something more meaningful and personal to you?
2. How are your needs for Autonomy, Relatedness, and Competence currently being met?  Are you growing and developing skills?  Do you get a chance to work together in community with others toward a shared goal?
3. What can you do to create a more satisfying work environment for yourself and others? What small step can you take this week to start moving things in the right direction?

Work can—and should be—a motivating experience.  Sometimes we forget, or become resigned to, a transactional relationship.  It doesn’t have to be that way.  Re-examine your beliefs, reframe your experience and rediscover your passion. Break out of carrot and stick thinking.  Consider the impact that increased Autonomy, Relatedness, and Competency can have on your life.

PS: You can learn more about Susan Fowler’s approach to motivation in the article Motivation As a Skill.  Also be sure to check out a free webinar that Susan is conducting on October 3, A Closer Look at the New Science of Motivation.  It’s a free event courtesy of Cisco WebEx and The Ken Blanchard Companies.

Granted, out of 7 billion people in the world, the odds of you being the absolute best at a particular something or other is pretty remote. But the point of the question is more general. What is it that you do really well? Probably better than most people you know? Knowing the answer to that question can help unlock levels of job satisfaction and engagement that you didn’t know existed.

Here are three steps you can take to understand the unique value you bring to your work and how you can stand out from the crowd.

1. Identify your strengths. Sounds pretty basic, huh? Well, it is pretty basic, but believe it or not, many people don’t have a good understanding of their strengths, weaknesses, or personality traits that help or hinder their success. Assessments such as the DISC, MBTI, Strengths Finder, or Marcus Buckingham’s newest StandOut survey can give you insight into what motivates you or how your personality preferences shape the way you perceive work experiences and “show up” to other people.

2. Understand the type of work or circumstances that best leverage your strengths and personality traits. One of my first “real” jobs was working for a popular Southern California fast food chain. I lasted one shift. The reason? My supervisor drilled into me the importance of following all the rules to the letter and corrected me whenever I deviated from them, yet he would go into the back of the kitchen and smoke a cigarette whenever he wanted (clearly in violation of the rules). I knew that I would never be happy working for a boss who didn’t display integrity in his actions. For me to be at my best, I need to be surrounded by people who have honorable values and strive to live up to those values.

One way to identify situations where you’ll thrive is to make a list of all the times where you’ve felt “in the flow” – those instances where you’ve been so absorbed in your work that you’ve lost track of time. What are the commonalities among those experiences? It might take a little digging and analysis, but you can probably find some themes running through those experiences. Perhaps it’s the type of people you worked with. Or maybe there was an element of problem-solving involved. Maybe it was the opportunity for you to use certain skills, like writing, teaching, or public speaking. Whatever the theme may be, it’s a clue to what really engages you and prepares you to take step #3 below.

3. Intentionally seek your “sweet spot.” Your “sweet spot” is that place where you find fulfillment in your work. You have two basic choices when it comes to identifying your sweet spot. The first is to leave it up to chance. You can hope that you stumble upon the type of job that is a good match for your personality and skills. Not a good option. The second choice is to actively look for situations that are a good match for what you bring to the table. Take what you’ve learned in steps 1 and 2 and apply it to your current situation. If you’re in a job that’s a complete mismatch for your personality and strengths, begin to put a plan together for how you can transition to something more in alignment with your natural gifts. If you’re in a job you like, but need a little more pizzazz in your work, map out new projects, tasks, or areas of responsibility that could benefit from the application of your strengths.

Discovering your strengths and learning how to use them in combination with your personality traits is an evolutionary journey. It doesn’t happen overnight and sometimes there is a lot of trial and error involved. However, taking a purposeful and introspective look into yourself and following these three steps can put you on the path toward finding a higher level of fulfillment and success in your work.

Randy Conley is the Trust Practice Leader at The Ken Blanchard Companies and his LeaderChat posts appear the last Thursday of every month. For more insights on trust and leadership, visit Randy at his Leading with Trust blog or follow him on Twitter @RandyConley.

Of all of the seven habits, none has changed my life more than Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood. As a husband and father, leader, teacher, and friend, the skill of listening with empathy has not only made me more effective, it has transformed relationships.

Stephen Covey described empathic listening as, “Reflecting what a person feels and says in your own words to their satisfaction so they feel listened to and understood.”  It means listening with your whole being—ears, eyes and heart.

When you make the time to truly listen to another person and make sure they know they were heard, you:

• Build trust—I believe nothing builds trust as deeply as truly listening to another person and trying to understand what they are saying and feeling from their perspective.
• Solve the “real” problem—Most of us tend to jump too quickly into problem solving without getting to the “real” problem first. Taking the time to listen for understanding, then reflecting what you have heard and felt, allows the real problem to surface.
• Diffuse feelings—Listening allows the other person to get their feelings out.
• Have greater influence—When the other person feels understood, they are more open to listening to you and you have a greater opportunity to influence them in a positive way.

Stephen Covey will be missed, but his spirit will live on through his books, his teachings, and his personal example.  The next time you are dealing with an angry customer, an excited coworker, a troubled friend, or even a happy five year-old child, I encourage you to take the time to listen to their story. It’s a great way to honor Stephen Covey’s memory.  You will be amazed by the impact truly listening has on the results, and more importantly, the relationship.

About the author:

John Hester is a senior consulting partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies.  You can read John’s posts on the first Monday of every month.