Precisely. It is, and has always been, possible for coaches to quickly establish a foundation of trust, and to use the “why” question from a totally encouraging place, and to further engage productively in the dialogue from the discovery emerging into the conversation from there. Just today I did such at the behest of the coach of two senior college rugby players who were having game confidence concerns. Carefully using the ‘why’ question in the right place produced a completely new realisation, perspective, and outcome and tool set for each of these two athletes. The issue has never been with the simple and innocent ‘why?’ question. It has always been with the style and accent in which the question is asked. Judith, and Susan, are nailing it for us. Thanks both. Malcolm S, NZ

Thank you for your insight Gilbert – how I wish the English language had the equivalent ?Pare qué ? Present and future intentions and desires is exactly what I was referencing. Intention is the ‘what’ (cognitive) and the desires is the ‘why’ (the heart or feeling). Thank you so much!